Who's really in charge?

[scoutmom21113]

No: HPFGUIDX 90350

"Bridget" wrote:
> Hi all! I've been re-reading the series, paying special attention 
to
> the parts where Harry is at the Dursleys', as it seems to me that
> Harry thinks Vernon is in charge. Vernon is the one who punishes 
and
> threatens him etc. But if you read closely, it's fairly obvious 
that
> Petunia is the one making the rules, Vernon is just the one
> enforcing them. <snip> We know Petunia knows more then she
> let on to knowing can the same be said of Vernon? Any ideas, other
> examples, and comments are much appreciated!

Carol:
I think that Vernon and Petunia are operating as a team in their
suppression of Harry but with different motivations. <snip a very 
interesting post>

I have no idea what's going to happen with the Dursleys in the next
two books, but I think it's time for Petunia to level with Vernon and
tell him what's really going on. He needs to understand that there's
more at stake than concealing from the world that they have an
"abnormal" nephew or connections with the WW he wants to believe does
not exist. <snip>

Bookworm:
This thread really got me to stop and think about Vernon and Petunia 
as a couple. In the opening scene Bridget described (up thread), 
Vernon is thinking about Petunia's reaction.  Bridget ascribed this 
to Petunia having the dominate role.  Certainly she did after the 
dementors and the howler.  But the quote Bridget gave when Vernon 
told Harry to listen to his aunt sounded more like tag-team 
parenting to me.  Statements like that are often heard in our house:

Father/Mother: "Get ready for bed."
Daughter: (whine, excuses, stalling...)
Father/Mother: "Get ready for bed, now."
Daughter: (more stalling...)
Mother/Father: "You heard what your Father/Mother said.  You have 30 
seconds to start running the bath."
Daughter: (stomp, stomp...) (Did I mention she is a pre-teen? <g>)

As Carol mentioned, Vernon and Petunia operate as a team.  Sometimes 
one or the other takes the more prominent role, depending on the 
circumstances.  In the scene where Petunia found out that Mrs. Figg 
has broken her leg and can't take Harry while the Dursleys take 
Dudley and Piers to the zoo, they are both making suggestions and 
objections to each other.  In CoS, when they are getting ready for 
the Masons' arrival, Vernon is the one in charge of setting the 
stage.  And when the letter from the Ministry arrived, it was Vernon 
who locked Harry in his room.

>From our family's experience, when there are issues with the 
teachers, my husband usually steps back because I'm the one with 
experience working in the schools.  So when magic is involved it 
seems that Vernon steps back and lets Petunia deal with it because 
of her family's history with magic.

Unfortunately, while I agree with Carol that Petunia *should* tell 
Vernon what she knows, I don't think she will.  Neither do I think 
that Vernon wants to know about it.  IMO, the pattern of secrecy 
about anything dealing with magic will continue, at least for the 
near future, until Dudley is in danger again.

Ravenclaw Bookworm