Sirius revisited

[smartone564]

No: HPFGUIDX 104164

Jocelyn Grunow wrote:

> So there is Sirius, still immature in his early 20s, thrust into 
Azkaban
> with nothing to do but dwell on the past.  In fact he remained 
suspended in
> time, fixated on his school-days, his school-friends and the 
evils of the
> past for TEN YEARS.  Isn't that what the dementors DO?  He 
was continually
> thrust by them into his darkest days, with no opportunity to 
move forward or
> develop perspective.
> 
> Even after his escape, he was unable to assist in the grown-up 
tasks around
> him, to use his strength and skills and to form more normal 
relationships;
> to succeed in something and build for the future.  Instead he 
was locked in
> a house he hated, with all around him infused with a mighty 
purpose he
> wasn't able to assist....  No one had the time, or perhaps the 
will and
> insight, to counsel him, and he would have needed a LOT of 
that.  No one
> loved him enough.

So what you are saying means that even when Sirius escaped 
Azkaban, he still had to relive his old life, feelings, memories, 
etc. since he was again trapped in that old house, in which no 
one stayed for long.  So basically, the only fun Sirius ever had 
was when he was immature and childish, during his school 
years after running away from home.  Then, for the rest of his life, 
he was forced to relive the horrible past, with one or two 
exceptions.  Forced to think about his past, this is what drove 
him to murder (Peter) since that is all he really had to think about 
in Azkaban, that wasn't necessarily a good feeling (it's 
murder/wrong) nor bad (avenging his best friend's death).

Theses exceptions are when he was on the run, reminding him 
of the fun times he had on full moons at school.  The other is for 
the brief visits HHR had, such as summer vacation and 
Christmas.  Consequently, he never grew up, because growing 
up wasn't fun or happy.  Similar to how Fudge ignored LV's 
return, because it was unpleasant.

Smart, who doesn't believe Sirius was really bad.