"I'm not proud of it"

[quigonginger]

No: HPFGUIDX 106897

I'm not really replying to any one person, I just wanted to add a 
thought.

Harry is seeing the scene fresh. (Freshly?)  It is all new to him, 
and he is still trying to take it all in.  

Remus and Sirius are seeing it as something that happened 20+ years 
ago.  They don't have the intensity that Harry does.  

I saw James and Sirius picking on Snape as not being all that 
horrible.  Bad, yes, but I have had worse bullying aimed at me.  I am 
not trying to defend them or to start a thread about how bad it 
actually was.  My point was that it was 20+ years ago, and that is 
how Sirius and Remus are seeing it.  

As I said, I had worse bullying aimed at me.  I look back now, at 
around the same age that Remus and Sirius are, and quite a bit of it 
now seems funny.  That's why I can see Sirius' reply of "I'm not 
proud of it" at face value.  He admits to having been an idiot and a 
berk, and he has accepted that that is what he was at 15.  He is no 
longer 15.  (He may act like it at times, but that's another thread.)

He has had 20+ years to think about it, in which time he may well 
have said to himself, "Good heavens, I was an idiot and a berk!"  But 
that revelation is no longer new, hence his seemingly placid 
attitude.  

RL example:  When I was in first grade, I called the superintendant 
an old silly.  I was so embarrassed and mortified by the terrible 
thing I had done (kids just didn't show a lack of respect for their 
elders in that time and place, no matter how old or silly they were) 
that I didn't want to ever go to school again.  I wanted to move out 
of the state.  I wanted to go back to Canada.  If you were to call me 
on it now, I would say "I'm not proud of it.  I was an insufferable 
little brat."  But I can't help but snake my head and smile when I 
say it.  Not because it wasn't wrong, but because it was 30+ years 
ago and I have changed greatly since then.  Now I no longer insult my 
elders.  But I must have looked really stupid.

I think that's how Remus and Sirius were thinking when they were 
talking to Harry.  Try remembering something bad you did when you 
were a kid that wasn't a capital crime, and see if you don't think 
you were an idiot.  You may turn red-faced in shame, but you will 
also note to yourself how you have changed since then, and see the 
kid that did it as a somewhat different entity than yourself.  

Did that make any sense?

Ginger, adding the caveat that all of the above is just opinion.  
There is no canon to back it up.  Any and all who read this are 
entitled to their own opinions, pro or con, and have every right to 
feel, believe, think, and post accordingly.  This is intended to be 
an alternate perspective, and is not the only one.  Those who hate 
Sirius and Remus and cannot forgive them can continue to do so at 
their leisure.  Some restrictions may apply.  See HB file for details.

Does anyone else miss the days when all that was taken for granted?