FILK: I’m Goyle

[Caius Marcius]

No: HPFGUIDX 92504

The fourth filk from my CoS musical, A Funny Thing Happened on the 
Way to the Chamber


I'm Goyle (CoS, Chap. 12)

To the tune of I'm Lovely, from Sondheim's A Funny Thing Happened on 
the Way to the Forum 

A brief MIDI can be heard at:

http://www.bway2.com/tracks/forum/

Dedicated to Pippin

THE SCENE: The first floor Girls' restroom on Gryffindor. HARRY, 
having taken the Polyjuice, steps out of the toilet stall to gaze in 
a mirror reflecting back the visage of GREGORY GOYLE. A moment later, 
RON steps out transmogrified into VINCENT CRABBE

HARRY (in the shape of GOYLE):
I'm Goyle,
All I am is Goyle,
Goyle is the thug I've turned into 
Stupid
Hasn't-got-a-clue-kid
Through and through.

Oh,
Don't I look a sight?  
I have features that
Would fill a ghoul with fright

But it's creepy
Creepy being Goyle,
Even though I've tripled his IQ.

RON (as CRABBE, spoken):
Harry . .

HARRY (spoken):
Yes?

RON:
Try to think.

HARRY:
Just try to think?

RON:
Yes.

HARRY:
OK.
I just thought

RON:
You have no idea how weird it is to see Goyle thinking


(music) You're Goyle.
Absolutely Goyle.
Who'd believe that soiled mess is you?
Dumbkopf
Big and ugly dumbkopf
Mingling with scum of 
The earth, too. 

But I've no cause to gab
For I've features just as gross
When I bear the face of Crabbe

BOTH
And we're hoping
Since we're Crabbe & Goyle,
To the dorm of Slytherin we'll go;
And we'll learn just how much Draco knows
..

   -	CMC

HARRY POTTER FILKS 
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm 
(updated yesterday with 86 new filks, including two new musicals, and 
three musicals-in-progress)