Harry, Ginny and me (was : Harry, Ginny, and age appropriateness...)

[delwynmarch]

No: HPFGUIDX 136124

I'm getting sick of it... I'm being attacked on things that I
specifically said I don't believe in, my hypothetical counter-examples
are misused as representations of my true beliefs, and in the meantime
the real subject I wanted to talk about is not being addressed. So
here's a recapitulative list of what I do and don't believe, and what
my real issues with the H/G romance are.

1. I DO *NOT* BELIEVE THAT HARRY IS ABUSING GINNY.

2. I *NEVER* ASKED HP TO BE TURNED INTO A ROMANCE.

It's *JKR* who chose to put some romance in her books. I never asked
her to give Harry a girlfriend, *she* made that choice. Personally, I
would have been more than happy to skip the whole Cho disaster, and I
could do without Ginny.

3. I also never asked her to make Love such a central theme of the
saga, to make it the most powerful form of magic and the one force
that will vanquish LV.

It is JKR who made those choices, not me. But now that she made them,
I expect her to stay true to them. If love is so important, then it is
totally illogical IMO to keep Harry's true romance off-screen.

4. JKR knows she's writing, among other people, for young people who
have an immature view of love and romance. That's why I expected her
to *explain* what a happy and healthy relationship is, instead of
assuming that all her readers would know.

JKR *knows* that way too many girls have an unhealthy interest in
Draco for example. So she knows that many young girls (and boys)
*cannot* be trusted to know what a healthy relationship is like. So
her not explaining (in the book) *why* Ginny and Harry's romance is a
good and healthy one is silly, a lost opportunity, and IMO even dangerous.

5. Everyone is not like each of us. Just because we don't read a scene
in a certain way doesn't mean that nobody else does, and vice versa.

And not everyone has the same life experience as each of us does: some
of us have never had a sweet teen romance to project on Harry and
Ginny, for example. So I'm glad to know that there are people out
there who have had such a romance that they can project on Harry and
Ginny, but for someone like me who didn't have that luck, the H/G
romance is simply *empty*.

6. All I was asking for was for JKR to *show* us the relationship
between Harry and Ginny instead of *telling* us about it. And no, it
would *not* take hundreds of pages, that's a totally fallacious
argument. Examples:

* Instead of telling us that Harry reminisces about a happy hour spent
with Ginny, let her show us Harry and Ginny having a happy time
together, so that we can see for ourselves that the relationship is a
happy and healthy one.

Example: "Harry and Ginny often spent an hour on the grounds in the
evening, dissing the teachers, sharing the funny moments that had
happened during the day, discussing their dreams and fears, commenting
on the Quidditch season and teams, or simply walking around the lake
hand in hand."

See? It takes 5 lines, and it lets me *see* that indeed their
relationship looks like what I consider a healthy and happy one. Not
to mention that it provides me with a *canon* basis to build on when I
think of them together.

* Instead of telling us that Harry is so happy, she could show it.

Example: "Harry often dreamt of Ginny: Ginny laughing, Ginny flying,
Ginny looking at him with that look in her eyes that made him feel
like the king of the world. And then he would wake up feeling elated
and full of optimism. Even the bad news in the Daily Prophet that
Hermione read out loud during breakfast most of the time didn't manage
to break his positive outlook on life."

And so on. This would not take a lot of room, and it would
significantly help people like me to know what is going on, and to
feel for themselves the goodness of that romance.

7. Everyone can disagree with my opinion that the depiction of the H/G
romance is disastrous, but that doesn't make my concerns any less valid.

I have several problems with the way the H/G romance is written, and
that is my *right*. I respect everybody else's right to have their own
take on that romance, and I ask that everybody else does the same for
me. Telling me that I don't get the author's intent, or that I should
do this or that is not helping. The fact is that I *have* a problem
with it, and I just wanted to discuss it.

8. What about my counter-arguments about the H/G romance? (see post
135989, at the end)?

Del