[HPforGrownups] Harry and Sirius (was Re: Harry and Boggarts)

[Magda Grantwich]

No: HPFGUIDX 122793

> Magda wrote:
> ...snip...
> 
> >>When Harry is prevented from communicating with
> Sirius, he feels closer to him than ever.  For all
> these reasons I think it was the IDEA of the other
> that each really cherished, not the present situation
> but some abstract future time when they could be
> godfather and godson, once the uncomfortable present
> was got over with.
> 
> Juli:
> OK, let me see if I understand what you're saying,
> Sirius and Harry don't really like spending time with
> each other, just the *idea* of being together? If I
> understood you correctly, then I disagree. As I see it
> they both enjoyed each others company, but they just
> don't know exactly how to behave. Sirius is constantly
> faced with the dilema of not knowing if HArry is Harry
> or James, he's never delt with children, he's never
> truly been an grown-up. Harry on the other hand has
> never had a parent figure in his life, Petunia and
> Vernon are just the people he lives with, he doesn't
> relate to them at all. So neither one knows how to
> act, they don't know if they should hug or something.
> I think if they had had the time they could really
> bond and become truly close.
> 

Magda again:

You've misunderstood me.  Of course they LIKED being together.  But
they weren't together often enough to really KNOW each other for WHO
they were (Harry, Sirius) rather than for WHAT they were (my best
friend James' son, my dad's best friend).  They thought they had
time, once Harry was out of Hogwarts, once Voldemort was defeated,
once a few years had passed, to develop a real relationship rather
than the patchwork occasional interactions they had in GOF and OOTP. 


Harry doesn't tell Sirius much about developments at Hogwarts in GOF
and OOTP because he doesn't want Sirius to worry and come down to
Hogwarts, therefore putting himself in danger and therefore getting
captured or killed and ending any possibility of their future life
together.  And Sirius puts off any revelations to Harry in OOTP
because it's more important for Harry to be at the Dursleys and
Hogwarts where he's safe than to talk about maybe living at 12GP
where they can be together.  Both are putting aside the present in
favour of the future, when things will finally be wonderful and they
can develop the relationship that circumstances prevent now.

I'm reminded of Dumbledore's comments to Harry re the Mirror of
Erised in PS/SS: "It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to
live."  I'm sure that Harry will look back at this period in his life
with regret for all the conversations they could have had, all the
stories he could have heard about his parents and grandparents, all
the togetherness they could have experienced because at the time it
seemed more important to keep up a reassuring facade to each other.  

And Harry's urge to communicate with Sirius is strongest when he's
prevented from doing so.  When he's actually at 12GP in the summer
and during Christmas, Sirius spends a lot of time feeding Buckbeak
and Harry spends time cleaning the house with the Dursleys, and
neither seems capable of reaching out to the other for some
buddy-time.  If they had the relationship that many posters (and
fan-ficcers) claim, this shyness would not have happened.

Magda


		
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