Abusive Dursleys (was Innocent Alby?)

[horridporrid03]

No: HPFGUIDX 123238


>>Betsy
<snip>
>What I *was* trying to point out was that Harry's treatment *would* 
go unnoticed by his school teachers and neighbors.  So there would be 
no legal interference.<

>>Salit:
>In Britain perhaps. I doubt that the Dursleys' attitude would go 
unnoticed in the schools I've seen here in the U.S. - there are 
teacher/parent conferences, Dr. visits, etc.<

Betsy:
I was actually talking about the States as I have no idea what the 
British system is like. But what would a doctor notice about Harry?  
No pattern of physical abuse to observe, he's not medically starving 
(I doubt the Dursleys would do a food slow down when Harry was up for 
a doctor's visit), he's clean, he's not clinically depressed.  As to 
a teacher's conference - again no physical or emotional signs of 
abuse.  Plus, Harry has stood out as a trouble maker (climbing school 
property, etc.) so I imagine the teachers might think the Dursleys 
had their hands full with him.

>>Betsy:
>However, I also want to point out that Harry doesn't act much like a 
victim of emotional (or physical for that matter) abuse.
<snip>

>>Salit:
<snip> 
>Still, I would argue that his actions wrt Hogwarts letter are the 
exception rather than the rule. Other than that he shows a lot of 
fear of the Dursleys reactions (snake in SS, pudding in CoS), obeys 
without arguments, etc. As he matures and gains confidence because of 
Hogwarts experience, he stands up to them more and more, but 
initially he is scared and obedient.<

Betsy:
I'm going to have disagree with you here.  I don't see Harry *ever* 
fearing the Dursleys - not the way an abuse victim fears his 
aggressor.  I didn't see any fear from Harry regarding the snake 
incident - more of a matter-of-fact, "something weird happens, I get 
grounded," attitude from Harry.  And he's rarely "scared and 
obedient."  He's sullen and obedient, and sometimes snarky and 
obedient, and sometimes even loudly protesting his innocence (the 
school climbing in PS/SS).

As far as the CoS pudding - *I* would have been terrified as a child 
if someone dumped a cake my mom had made for guests on the floor and 
I knew it was going to look like I'd done it.  My parents were in no 
way abusive - I would have been grounded as Harry was, though I know 
my folks wouldn't have locked me in.  I think Harry's reaction was 
pretty universal there.

>>Salit:
>I was not saying that his situation was reason enough to endanger 
his life by removing him from the Dursleys. Only that I believe their 
behaviour to Harry is indeed abusive.<

Betsy:
I think we may be coming at the same conclusion from two different 
directions. :)  I was also trying to make the point that Harry's 
situation at the Dursleys was not bad enough to endanger his life by 
pulling him out (or calling the attention of the WW to his 
whereabouts by confronting the Dursleys).

I agree that his situation was far from ideal and the Dursleys were 
horrible to Harry.  They were also, in a different way, horrible to 
Dudley.  I do have a personal tic when it comes to the word "abuse".  
I think it gets thrown around too loosely.  I have the same tic with 
the word "rape".  But I recognize that it's my own personal bugaboo, 
so I'm not going to go tilting at windmills on this.  Which is my 
very long, roundabout way of saying, if you want to call what the 
Dursleys did to Harry "abuse", by all means, do so.  (I'm sure you're 
thrilled to have my permission! <beg>)

Betsy