FILK: Pore ***** is Daid

[Caius Marcius]

No: HPFGUIDX 133314

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Pore `Gog Is Daid

To the tune of Pore Jud Is Daid from Rodgers & Hammerstein's Oklahoma!

Dedicated to Tracy Hunt (the stage manager)

THE SCENE: Hagrid's hut. HARRY, HAGRID, & SLUGHORN give the late
Acromantula Aragog an appropriately sober-minded send-off.

HAGRID:
Pore `Gog is daid,
Pore Aragog is daid.
The Forest's great Webmaster is no more
He spun a mighty web
But then all his powers ebbed
Like Odo in them bygone days of yore

HARRY & SLUGHORN
Pore `Gog is daid,
Pore Aragog is daid.
Oh, nevermore our spider friend will spin

HAGRID:
Friend will spin!

HARRY & SLUGHORN
We'll lay him `neath the ground
Where eternal rest is found
And so he won't get et up by his kin

SLUGHORN: (speaking)
Folks, we is gathered here to mourn and say farewell to Aragog, the
king of the arachnids, whose long and faithful friendship those who
knew you won't forget. Though your body is like to decay, your spirit
lingers on in the quiet web-spun places of your forest home. As your
good friend Hagrid was wont to say, you was the most misunderstood
organism in all of the Forbidden Forest. People used to say you was a
mean, hungry fella and they called ya a no-account webslinger and an
eight-leggéd freak

(Singing)
But to folks what really knowed 'im
Like our Rubeus Hagrid as he patrolled
He was a creature worth his weight in gold

HAGRID
Although his blood ran cold-

SLUGHORN:
He so loved the human race

HARRY
It was his favorite taste -

SLUGHORN: (Speaking)
He loved the birds of the forest
And the beasts of the field,
He loved the cows and the horses in the barn,
And he thought that cats tasted like quails, and he was right!
And he loved the little children, more than anybody
Or anything in the world...Only he'd never left the corpus delecti,
So nobody ever convicted him
.

(Singing)
Pore `Gog is daid,
Pore Aragog is daid.
May he go to his reward with all due haste

HARRY & HAGRID
All due haste!

SLUGHORN:
'Tis a critter I revere with a venom that's so dear
That I guarantee no drop shall go to waste.

HARRY
Pore `Gog is daid, our arachnid is daid,
I won't forget the day that he played host

SLUGHORN & HAGRID:
Host --

HARRY:
It's sad his spider sense of a sudden went past tense
Let's raise a cup to him in solemn toast

SLUGHORN & HAGRID (clinking glasses):
Toast!

ALL THREE:
Pore `Gog is daid, our arachnid is daid,
Oh, why do giant spiders have to die?

HARRY (aside, as he magically refills his companions' cups)
I'll let my friend to grieve
But become the Boy Who Weaves
And, spider-wise, catch Slughorn on the fly
.

ALL THREE:
Pore `Gog, pore `Gog!

   - CMC

HARRY POTTER FILKS
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm