FILK: To Do Her Dark Detention

[Caius Marcius]

No: HPFGUIDX 130559

To Do Her Dark Detention (OOP, Chap. 15)

To the tune of I Am So Proud from Gilbert & Sullivan's The Mikado

http://diamond.boisestate.edu/gas/mikado/webopera/song10.html

THE SCENE: The Great Hall. McGONAGALL & ANGELINA JOHNSON react with 
anger when they learn that HARRY has earned himself a second week of 
detention with Delores Umbridge. 

McGONAGALL
You both got loud
But I'm allowed
To quiet the scene
And intervene
For my advice
Did not suffice
To shut your trap
When Dolores talks crap.
I'll take away points 
To make my point
You're out of joint
You disappoint 
You disappoint 

ANGELINA: 
Our Quidditch team
Won't rank supreme 
We will fall through
All thanks to you,
All thanks to you;
If you'd the wit
To simply sit
Through class, you'd cruise 
We would not lose
Now this young witch
In woe is rich
We'll Seek no Snitch
Thanks to your glitch

HARRY: 
I heard her say 
That Quirrell's OK
The criminal who 
Helped You-Know-Who
I did not fail
To mock her tale
And so detained, detained
With too much pain. 
But I defy
Old Fudge's ally
I tell no lie
Is ever my cry

The three repeat their verses, all singing simultaneously  (thus 
preventing the would-be eavesdroppers from Ravenclaw from listening 
in)

MCGONAGALL
Your plight
Tonight is that you must write
Just make this leap:
Your temper keep 
Make not a peep
Against that creep
Rewards you'll reap
You'll get more sleep

ANGELINA: 
Your plight
Tonight is that you must write
I'm sure you see
That your duty
Is be truly
For the GQT
That once flew free
With rare beauty 

HARRY
My plight
Tonight, although I write,
Let her begin
To carve my skin
Despite her sin
To her chagrin
I'll not give in
She will never win!

MCGONAGALL (simultaneously with the other two singers)
You'll get more sleep, etc.

ANGELINA: (simultaneously with the other two singers)
With rare beauty, etc.

HARRY (simultaneously with the other two singers)
I'll not give in
She will never win, etc.

HARRY, McGONAGALL & ANGELINA 
To do her dark detention is a drear dread drill
As I/you hear her hemful hacking like a sharp shriek shrill
I/You scribble every sentence with her cold cruel quill
That bids my/your blood be battered to this fiend fulfill!
To do her dark detention is a drear dread drill
And hear her hemful hacking like a sharp shriek shrill
I/You scribble every sentence with her cold cruel quill
That bids my/your blood be battered to this fiend fulfill!
A drear dread drill!
A sharp shriek shrill!
A cold cruel quill! 
A fiend fulfill!
To do a dark detention
As I/you hear her hemful hacking
And to scribble every sentence 
That bids my/your blood be battered to this fiend fulfill!

  -	CMC (whose rhyming and alliterating muscles are now quite 
fatigued)

HARRY POTTER FILKS
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm 
(updated 6/12/05 with 100 new filks!)