Umbridge, detention, scars, and plotlines, oh my!. - Clumsy?

[Steve]

No: HPFGUIDX 126092


--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, "lupinlore" <bob.oliver at c...> wrote:
> 
> --- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, "Chys Sage Lattes"
> <yami69hikari at y...> wrote:
> > 
> > 
> > Lupinlore:
> > 
> > 
> <SNIP>
> > > 
> > 
> > 
> > How is it clumbsy foreshadowing if he actually gets part of what
> > he wants, having earned it himself? (... Isn't the point of 
> > foreshadowing to show something that could potentially happen? 
> > Just because it's something the character desires doesn't make it 
> > any less of an achievable goal.)


> Lupinlore:  
> 
> Because Ron most definitely HAS NOT earned it.  Dumbledore himself
> admitted that Harry was the one who deserved the badge.  Ron 
> receiving it as he did represents extremely poor writing on JKR's 
> part,...
> 
> ...edited..
> 
> Lupinlore

bboyminn:

I will agree with you that some of the writing was a little clumsy.
But it was not Ron getting the Prefect Badge that was clumsy but the
final explanation of why he got it. And in saying that, I don't mean
the reason, but the way the final explanation was written.

First, if not Harry, then who? No one other than Ron has distinguished
himself in any way. So, all things weighed, Harry had way too much on
his plate already, that only leaves Ron. So, Ron got it. 

Seems very logical to me. In addition, not unexpected. Many of us have
been predicting for a long long time, that as the story went on, Ron
would start to distinguish himself; he would start to stand on his
own, and be measured by his own achievements.

Also note that Ron did not see himself as Prefect, he saw himself as
Headboy, and we already know you don't need to be Prefect to become
Headboy. True, it's helps, but it's not required. 

What Ron saw in the Mirror was achievement, a desire to distinguish
himself, to be the equal or better of his brother. That's a very
reasonable desire. And, Ron has distinguished himself all through the
story, although, I don't think he completely realizes that history
will remember him far above and beyond any of his brothers. 

Ron see his achievement by the only means of measurement he has
available to him at the time, so I don't think it was so much the
specific things he saw that he wanted, it was to achieve and stand-out.

Now to the /clumsiness/. The phrase (something to the effect of),
'...enough to be getting on with...' was used just a little too often
for my taste. It may be a very common 'Britishism', but to my American
ears, once was enough, but every use after that was jarring. And to
use it to explain a very critical point in the story, why Harry wasn't
 Prefect, was weak. Especially weak, as I have noted, because the
phrase had already been used. 

I buy Ron as Prefect, I really liked the idea. I buy the general
explanation; makes sense to me, but the way it was written was weak.

As long as we are on over-used phrases, someone turning their head
suddenly and 'cricking' their neck one time is interesting, but more
than that is weak.

As far as Ron getting on the Quidditch team, I've been predicting that
for years. I even predicted he would be Keeper. In addition, I have
been predicting that Ron will eventually become Team Captain (note-
/eventually/), but I don't base that on the Mirror. I see that as part
of the natural dynamics of the story, and the natural dynamics of
Harry and Ron, all independant of what Ron saw in the Mirror.

For what it's worth, unless Harry is dead, I don't think Ron will be
Headboy. But he will still have, in the end, a very outstanding career
at Hogwarts, history-making outstanding.

As long as we are on the subject of surprises, I have no problem with
Ginny's developement, because, in my own mind, I always picture her as
a much stronger character than she was being made to appear. I also
love the character that developed; smart, brave, daring, strong,
outspoken, stubborn--a Weasley to the very core. Coming from her
family, how could she be anything other than what she is?

So, I agree parts of the story were clumsy, but not in the storyline
or character development, I see it in the simple basic mechanics of
writing. Personally, I think some of the copy editors should have
called JKR on those repetitive phrases.

Just a few thoughts.

Steve/bboyminn