[HPforGrownups] Re: Sadistic!Snape? (was:Snape's canon opposite/ Proving loyalty...)

[Sherry Gomes]

No: HPFGUIDX 140284

Abby asked:

I just want to ask some questions; who among you have not 
delighted in making in a person we dislike feel bad? If we have 
personal enemies do we not rejoice, secretly or perhaps not so 
secretly if they get hurt? Don't we go out of our way to make 
those people feel uncomfortable? Is this the absolute sadism? 
How many of us here, have forgiven our childhood enemies? Would 
we be able to face them and be polite? Or am I the only deeply 
flawed individual here?



Sherry responds:

Well, Abby, first of all I don't think you're flawed.  However, no, I don't
go out of my way to be impolite or unkind to people who have done me wrong
in some way.  I try with all my might never to act toward people like that
as they have acted toward me.  For one thing, it's unprofessional in the
workplace, so it's a good habit to get out of.  And it just isn't my way.  I
might actually be even more polite toward someone like that, than I would be
to a trusted friend, whom i could tease and insult without fear.

As forgiving childhood enemies, yes, I've forgiven them.  I didn't have
enemies like a Draco for instance, but I had a lot of people make fun of me
for my disabilities, including some cousins.  I'm nearly 48 now, and I sure
have forgotten those things.  I don't hold against my cousin, who was
probably only repeating what she heard grownups say.

However, the one person I do not forget or forgive is my own personal Snape,
a teacher in high school who was indeed sadistic and thought himself just
pushy and tough.  To make it worse, he didn't actually teach anything, but
he was the teacher in my school, who oversaw the lives of the blind students
in that particular public high school.  He had enormous power over our
lives, poked his nose into our personal business, caused me great trouble
with my dad.  Sometimes, it was deserved, but often it was not.  He is the
reason I never went to college, because for years, the very idea made me
physically ill.  i was not the kind of kid to fight back, like Harry.  I was
the type to take it in and internalize it.  

So, no, I have not forgiven him.  However, if I was in a position of
authority over his grandchildren, i would never ever hold their relative's
sins against them.  That is incredibly childish and downright cruel and
ridiculous.  I would never even be unkind or cruel to him, if I was somehow
in authority over him.  After all, it would mean stooping to his level,
becoming as terrible as he was to act like that.  I hope I am a better
person than that.  I have made sure never to see him again, and I'm happy
with that.  

I don't mean that to imply anyone who acts differently than i is like Snape.
It is just life choices I've made about the kind of person I want to be,.
Perhaps it's why I react so visceral to Snape's teaching method.  more
toward Neville.  And no, that teacher did not make me stronger.  I got all
my stubborn strong will from my father.  

Snape seems to me to delight in the torment he puts his students through,
the weaker he perceives the student to be the more fun he has at it.  He
loves beating down the strong ones, Like Harry, and Hermione for her
knowledge.  He revels in abusing Neville.  The difference between any of us
who might take it out on an enemy someday or find pleasure in an enemy's
pain is that hopefully, it is adult to adult.  to find pleasure in
tormenting children is sick.


Sherry