Was Tom Riddle, Sr. Selfish?

[dumbledore11214]

No: HPFGUIDX 148593

> Carol responds:
<SNIP>
 Yes, he accepted a
> drink of what he thought was water from a wall-eyed, ugly girl who
> could not distinguish love from infatuation and thought she could 
make
> him love her, so in a sense he is her victim. But she, too, is a
> victim, and I would argue that the abuse she suffered from her 
father
> for most of her life, both physical and emotional, was at least as 
bad
> as being seduced into marriage with an ugly, poor, uneducated woman
> who had not been taught that you don't practice magic on Muggles. 

Alla:

But Merope was not HIS victim, no? Tom wanted nothing to do with her 
and it was his ABSOLUTE right IMO not to have anything to do with 
her. Merope was victim of her "father" and "brother". As far as  I 
am concerned, she had NO right whatsover to do what she did.


Carol:
Tom,
> quite understandably, rejected her and felt that he had been 
tricked,
> but surely, once he pulled himself together, he could at least have
> made some provision for his unborn child. 

Alla:

He COULD, He did not HAVE TO, IMO. He was raped,IMO, whether Merope 
fully realised what she did or not. If he did not want to have 
anything to do with the person who raped him or the child of this 
rape, I understand him completely.

Carol:
He didn't suffer the
> traumatic effects of forced sex or unwanted pregnancy that a woman
> would have suffered, only the blow to his pride of having been
> "hoodwinked" by the ugliest girl in the village (and perhaps in 
all of
> England). 

Alla:

How do you know that he did not suffered traumatic effects of forced 
sex?

Carol:
 
> His problem was not the unwanted sex, which he could easily have
> gotten over, but the unwanted marriage. 

Alla:

Same question. How do you know that he could easily gotten over it?


> Carol, whose sympathies lie mostly with Merope and who wonders what
> Tom Sr. would have thought of his lookalike son had he chosen to 
raise him
>

Alla, 
who tries to remember VERY hard that Merope was abused all her life, 
but who starts to hate Merope, when she thinks  about her crime.


> Betsy Hp:
> It's hard, if not impossible, to play the "who's the bigger 
victim" 
> game with Tom and Merope.  They both had a very hard time of it.  
> However, Tom was not seduced.  He was raped. Repeatedly.  Calling 
it 
> anything else is hiding the ball, I think.


Alla:

Oh, my. I agree with Betsy.


JMO,

Alla