Merope's "utter selfishness"? (was: Why Tom left Merope)

[horridporrid03]

No: HPFGUIDX 147055

> >>Betsy Hp:
> > <snip>
> > Then, in an act of utter selfishness, she couldn't even 
> > be bothered to try and stick around for her son.  Huh.  Maybe    
> > I'm not all that sympathetic after all. <g>

> >>SSSusan:
> Ooooh, you had me ALL the way to here, Betsy.  Even right up to 
> Merope having never had a toy before, she broke this one. ;-)  
> 
> But to call what she did at the orphanage "an act of utter 
> selfishness"?  I can't go that far.  She had been left by Tom, she 
> was flat broke, she had no family she could turn to for help, and 
> no assets left.  Did you not feel despair in what she did?        
> desperation? depression?  (Hmmm -- a different 3 Ds from the 3 Ds 
> we get introduced to with apparition lessons.)  I do think Merope 
> was despondent, desperate and depressed, and to me that's enough   
> to remove the label "utter selfishness" from the action she took.  
> Without context I'd call it that, but with the context, I cut her 
> some slack for seeing no way out.

Betsy Hp:
Hmm, I agree I was being a bit harsh on Merope for dying.  As you 
point out, I wasn't really considering Merope's state of mind.  I 
think she was hit with a blow that she couldn't bounce back from 
when she released Tom from her control.  One that even the prospect 
of a child couldn't overcome.  I think Merope realized that she had 
become as bad, if not worse, than her father.

When Merope released Tom from the Imperius curse or took him off the 
love potion or whatever, Dumbledore thinks that she was expecting or 
at least hoping that Tom would retain some sort of love for her.  
And of course, he doesn't.  It wouldn't surprise me if his reaction 
helped her realize how badly she'd treated him.

The fact that she had her baby at a Muggle facility instead of St. 
Mungos suggests that Merope may have *chosen* to give up on magic.  
Perhaps, horrified by what she had done, Merope felt that she 
couldn't be trusted with that sort of power, couldn't be trusted 
with a baby, and maybe even felt like she didn't deserve to live.  
Depression, despondency and desperation, indeed.

Betsy Hp