Eileen Pince

[wynnleaf]

No: HPFGUIDX 156259

--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, Joe Goodwin 
<joegoodwin1067 at ...> wrote:
>
> 
> wynnleaf <fairwynn at ...> wrote:    
> 
> wynnleaf: 
> 
> I think this is really crucial to understanding why Snape hated 
James'
> "arrogance" so much. It's one thing to watch another boy showing 
off
> with the snitch or messing with his hair. Snape might look down on
> that, or think "how stupid," but I doubt if that would inspire 
hatred
> -- it's just not important enough. But if the other boy uses
> ridiculing you and bullying you in public as a means of showing 
off --
> making you a public exhibition for his entertainment *and* to show 
the
> girls what a *cool* guy he is -- well, yeah, I can understand 
hating
> someone for that. 
> 
> Joe: I know a lot of people aren't going to get this but James 
Potter was behaving like all most all boys do as they grow up. If 
you have a son, husband or boyfriend they almost certainly have done 
something similar in the past. 
>    
>   It is classic pack behavior and like it or not teenage boys do 
behave like that. It is true that those that see themselves as 
stronger are more likely to do so than those who think of themselves 
> as weak but regardless almost all of them will have done it at 
some point.

wynnleaf
I'm not going to disagree with you on that Joe, since I can't speak 
from personal experience.  But I'd like you to clarify your comment 
a bit.  I see the actions of James as very similar to a real life 
situation where one boy attacks another without provocation, gets 
his friend to hold the kid down, and hits him repeatedly.  That's 
the physical, real-world equivalent as I see it. Is that the kind of 
behavior that you meant when you said it was common behavior for 
boys? 

While I know that guys can act pretty rough to each other, and I am 
often amazed at the terrible things boys will *say* to each other, 
even their friends, I haven't got any evidence that the above degree 
of bullying behavior is common to all boys.  Perhaps I, like Lily, 
have been kept in the dark as regards this kind of behavior among 
guys.  But at least to date, I can't think of any time my brothers 
or my son have been involved in this kind of thing.  I *have* heard 
of this kind of thing happening of course, but when my 3 teenagers 
tell me about this kind of behavior, the way they tell it, it's only 
certain types of guys that will go to this extreme.  

My son is in the room while I write this, so I asked him how common 
it was.  According to him, the kind of guy who would actually accost 
another guy without provocation, have his friend hold him down, and 
attack him is almost always one of a few types of people (warning 
for teenage stereotypes) 1. athletic super-jock who thinks he's the 
greatest and is ticked off 2.  unconscionable bully 3. agressive 
(bad word) who is, well, (edit) really angry.  Plenty of guys might 
*talk* about doing it, but most would not.  Plenty of guys will get 
in fights, but not like I outlined above.  Thus proclaimed my 
teenage son.  Of course, this is only the viewpoint of one mid-
western US teenager.

wynnleaf