Why does Snape wants DADA job if it cursed? LONG

[Sydney]

No: HPFGUIDX 148948

Man, the challengers for round 2 are already lining up to kick poor
decrepit suicidal!Snape's behind!

Neri:
> After all, we see in HBP that Snape *is* an expert in breaking Dark
> curses, including one put by the Dark Lord himself on the ring
> Horcrux, and I can quite see him convincing himself that he is better
> than all the past DADA teachers put together, and only he can break
> the DADA jinx. It would be very much in character. In fact, a jinx
> everyone talks about for years and years but no one can break would
> make Snape want the DADA post *more*, not less. 

Oh, I think this is totally in character for Snape, which is why I
included it in the initial list-- it was lupinlore's 'denial what
curse I don't see any curse I'm a pasteboard villain so I don't make
sense but I'm so psychologically subtle at the same time that I also
don't make sense' version that was causing me the whiplash.  

Unfortunately, this theorylet runs into the difficulty that Snape is
still primarily a double-agent.  So he might think he can break the
curse, but he would have some 'splainin' to do the next time he saw
Voldemort.  Although I would adore a scene that went like, 

-- enter Snape, briskly

Snape:  Right boss, I finally got that DADA job, what do you want me
to do?  I mean, the first thing obviously was to get rid of that curse
some idiot put on it, but now that I've done that..
V-mort:  WHAT?! My beautiful curse!! 
Snape:  Oh, that was YOUR curse?

I didn't put that in the orignal 'cons' list because *cough*I didn't
think of it*cough*.  The ORIGINAL cons list was that it didn't add
anything to the Snape/Harry dynamic, it just goes to the illustration
of Snape's character, in which case I think JKR would have had a scene
where's Snape's attitude to the curse was made explicit, so we could
watch him fall with that in mind.  Arrogant!Snape would work so much
better that way, no?  

What else have we got?

Tonks: 
> Ok, how about this one:
> SS wants the DADA position because he knows the Dark Arts and would
> be a very good teacher of the subject.  And (due to the whole LV
> killed Lily and James and now I am a bitter and damned man) he hates
> LV and wants to teach the young wizards how to defend themselves
> against him.  "Don't be a fool like I was in my youth", "Don't fall
> for the Dark Lord's lure".  DD can't give the job to him because it
> would "out" Snape as DD's man.

JustCarol adds:
>DD's options have run out; Voldemort is back and he desperately needs
>Snape's expertise.
>Moreover, there really is no one else he can hire. At the same time,
>he needs Slughorn to take the Potions position so he can protect >*him*
a>nd get that memory (and have him available to act as HOH when Snape
>inevitably loses the position).
>IMO, they both know that the jig is up. They are out of options. And
>there's just the slightest hope that Snape can end the curse,
>returning as either DADA or Potions master the following year. 

My concern here is that this doesn't give sufficent weight to the
curse.  I mean, picture yourself at a job interview.  And the
interviewer is going on and on about this wonderful project, it's
right up your street, you're their A choice, there's this slight thing
with this curse that means you'll leave in disgrace and possibly
brain-damaged or dead after a year, but it's got this great parking
space and I think we can really make the most of your talents here. 
Now what part sort of popped out there?  

And I think JKR intends the curse to be at the forefront, because,
first, (sob!!) she hardly showed us any of Snape's DADA's classes, so
they can't have been that interesting, and second, she leaves
revealing the curse to getting on to the Big Second Act Turn, which to
me flags that this is Significant.  Not too long after this we see the
curse have Snape for breakfast.  So if (like me) you finished the book
and turned right back to the beginning and started again, all that
stuff about Snape wanting the DADA job takes on an ominous, ambiguous
note.

Now here comes a strong, silent, hulking brute of a theory: 
NothingToSeeHereFolks, the coverstory!Snape that Miles resurrected:

>-- Snape DOESN'T want the DADA job;  his yearly applications are just
>a front to give Dumbledore a chance to make a public display of not
>trusting Snape.

Sigh.  You know, I think this just has such a good chance of being the
correct theory.  Because there were so many reasons to give Snape the
job in book 6, whether he'd been after it before or not-- the UV, the
degenerative ring curse if you buy it, getting Slughorn there.. and, I
mean, how many people thought Snape ACTUALLY wanted the job before
that Umbrige scene?  And let's face it, Snape trots it right out on
cue in Spinners End.

Soooo... boring... can't... focus.. on theory....

Hey, speaking of Spinner's End-- did Snape get the DADA gig before or
after this scene?  Because if it was BEFORE, then we have the curse
acting in it's anti-felix felicis way.  But if it's AFTER-- which
there is good reason to believe, due to Snape riding that old 'd-dore
wont give me the DADA job' hobbyhorse-- if it's AFTER, then we can
pretty safetly connect Snape getting the job to him swearing the UV. 
Which is a good sign that, as I'd certainly always assumed, Snape told
D-dore all three parts of the Vow. *sticks tongue out at Alla*

*fondly punches Magpie in the arm*:

>Actually, I don't think that's an obsession.  Sydney's alternate name of
>"Kamikaze" Snape makes all the difference.  A regular suicide may be
someone
>who feels sorry for himself and hangs himself in despair hoping everyone
>will be sorry now.  But I think a different mindset goes into being a
>kamikaze (or a terrorist bomber).  That's someone wanting to die for a
>cause--or as a final gesture to the enemy.

Yeah, I'm sorry-- kamizake!Snape IS much more illustrative of what I
have in mind-- I mean, if Snape just plain wanted to off himself,
isn't he, like, one of the world's foremost experts on poisons or
something?  I think either he's made a promise to D-dore not to take
his own life, so he needs somebody else (or, like, a curse) to do it
for him, or it's a "dagnab it, just let me stop this spying crap and
take a run at these guys" thing (although a "they'll all be sorry when
they find out" element is irresistibly Snapey *hugs Snape*).  Bear in
mind, I'm not positing deathwish!Snape soley to cover the DADA thing,
I'm trying to find a Grand Unified Snape Theory so that all the
remaining stuff-- why d-dore trusts him, and what motivates him
generally-- can be summed up in one fell swoop, if only to spare the
poor old Snape-haters all that lingering lovingly over him.

Carol:
>But that the
>position is still cursed, and that both Snape and DD are its victims,
>is also, to me at least, abundantly clear.

On this, I think, we can almost all agree.

-- Sydney, on the brink of assembling coloured post-it notes for all
the theories!