Respecting the Dursleys (and other family connections)

[Rick & LeAnn Kelley]

No: HPFGUIDX 159528

There are so many things wrong with the Dursleys that I cannot begin to list
them all - they are hypocritical, self-centered, and they most certainly are
abusive, even more so emotionally than physically - (making Harry work while
Dudley plays, depriving him of anything which makes him happy, never
celebrating Harry's birthday while completely spoiling Dudley - the list
goes on and on).  But IMHO their greatest abuse of Harry is denying him love
and affection.  It appears that Petunia did not take Harry into her home
because of any emotional attachment, but rather out of fear.  Children sense
the emotions of their environments.  They must receive warmth and love for
normal development, and if Harry were not so exceptional he might have
become incorrigible by the age of ten.  The only sympathy I can show Dudley
is the fact that his parents seem incapable of showing him any mature love,
either.  Instead they drown him in overindulgences while failing to teach
him any of the requirements of living in civilized society.  They seem to
think that is love, but they are clueless.  They even chose to send him to a
school where he is rewarded for physical violence.  We know that although
Dudley will someday make his own choices and can choose to overcome his lack
of teaching, in all likelihood will be a complete failure as an adult,
multiplying his parents' faults exponentially.  (This is what DD was trying
to tell them, but they couldn't understand.)  We know they love Dudley
because they were truly concerned about him after the dementor attack, but
they either don't have the capacity, or are too lazy to be responsible in
their love.  Instead they satisfy only their own needs by seeing their Ickle
Dudders happy at all times.  That's a much easier role as a parent than
saying no.   Unless there is some type of major intervention, I don't see
that Dudley has a chance.  Since both Vernon and Marge are boorish, we can
only assume they are perpetuating the cycle from their own childhoods.  

 

The question then becomes, why does Petunia act as she does?  She is
obviously trying to please Vernon, but why did she make such a complete
break with her own family?  Why there is never any mention of Harry's
extended family?  You'd think Petunia would have photos of her parents
around, and that she would also have aunts or cousins who would visit
occasionally.  We know Petunia was bitter about the attention Lily received,
but was that enough to make her completely give up all family connections?
It's just never made sense to me that Harry grew up in his aunt's house, but
never knew anything at all about his grandparents or the rest of his
mother's family. (In the same way, it never made sense to me that Molly
Weasley's Prewitt brothers were killed by LV, but her children made no
mention of a family connection to them.)  Did JKR just decide not to devote
the time it would take to explain the family ties, or is there some reason
why those connections were hush-hush?  

 

Anyone have any ideas?

 

Anders

 

 



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