DD at the Dursleys: Better Manner to Accept.

[Steve]

No: HPFGUIDX 158039

--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, "hickengruendler"
<hickengruendler at ...> wrote:
>
>  
> > Steven1965aaa:
> > 
> > I don't see "teasing".  Contrast the Dursleys' 
> > behavior with Snape at Spinner's end who invites Bella
> >  and Narci in... The Dursleys did none of that so DD 
> > did it for them. ... Its true that the  glasses wound
> > up hitting them in the head but as DD said it would 
> > have been better manners to drink it.  I don't see 
> > offering someone a drink as "teasing" ....
> 
> Hickengruendler:
> 
> Not that I want to excuse the Dursleys, and I already 
> said, that I don't have any problems with this scene. 
> But ... Dumbledore probably was a total starnger to 
> them, at the very least to Vernon. ... I want to see 
> you, if you would invite a stranger in, who rings at 
> your door in the middle of the night.
> 
>

bboyminn:

OH MY GOD! Dumbledore annoyed the Dusleys, he should be
shot!

While people are free to react to the scene as they 
please, and those reactions can not be discounted, 
let us at least make an effort to keep the scene in 
perspective. 

Dumbledore offerred the Dursleys a drink. OH MY GOD! He 
should be shot! (sarcasm, in case you didn't get it) In
many parts of the world the refusal to offer hospitality
or the refusal to accept hospitality is a grave insult.
Even if the offer is half-hearted and the acceptance is
equally half-hearted, you do it as a matter of social 
courtesy.

Keep in mind that Dumbledore didn't beat the Dursleys
to a bloody pulp. The wine glasses simply annoyed them,
and the solution was very simple; graciously accept the
glasses but refuse the drink. Dumbledore was not trying
to force the Dusley to /drink/ the wine/mead, all they
had to do was take the glass from the air and set it on
the table, and the whole incident would have been over
with. 

One could speculate that they were confused and didn't
know what to do with magical glasses, but they had Harry
and Dumbledore's actions as a model, so I have trouble
accepting a plea of ignorance. 

So, let us not lose our sense of perspective here, at worst
the Dursley were annoyed for a few minutes, not tortured 
for hours.

To the next aspect, yes, Harry forgot to warn the Dursleys
that Dumbledore was coming, but once Dumbledore arrived it
became very clear very quickly who he was and why he was
there, and a basic minimal level of social courtesy would 
have been required; and I mean /minimal/ level of courtesy.
The Dusleys could have observed basic courtesy while at the 
same time /not/ being the least bit friendly. They could
have been very business-like and abrupt in their dealings
with Dumbledore, and still stay in the realm of courtesy.

In my mind, the whole scene re-enforces my view of the 
Dursleys as total failures as human beings. They talk of
propriety and social status all the while betraying their
total lack of both. 

Just one man's opinion.

Steve/bboyminn