[HPforGrownups] Re: DD at the Dursleys: Better Manner to Accept.

[Marion Ros]

No: HPFGUIDX 158170

Tonks:
>>>Thank you for fresh input into this scene. The website you mentioned 
also says:
"Hospitality is an act of redemption as well as a celebration. It 
not only forgives faults in others, it doesn't notice them. The 
hospitable person is only too aware of her own needs and 
shortcomings and of her own need for forgiveness. She is not only 
generous with what she has; she is generous in her assessment of 
others; in forgiving and accepting people. She exhibits an attitude 
of humility that looks for ways to serve the needs of others rather 
than being served. The hospitable person is not envious or covetous 
for all of us have been the stranger, the one on the outside, poor 
or weak in some way. In the ancient world, hospitality to the 
stranger was a holy obligation."

<snip>

If we look at the scene from this perspective what we get is DD 
offering forgiveness to the Dursleys and the Dursleys refusing. 
Instead of the Dursleys acknowledging their sins (which they are 
blind too) and asking forgiveness, DD is opening their mind to 
seeing their follies and still offering them forgiveness through 
the "hospitality" that they did not offer to him. I think if we 
look at the scene from this POV we see something quite different 
than we have before and the scene takes on a whole new meaning.<<<<



Marion:
Soooo.... if I, a total stranger would knock on your door, you would not only invite me in, give me food and drink and you would confess your 'sins' to me, because I could be an angel? Really? 
I mean, *really*?!
So if I was of some religious sect and you said, 'No, I don't want to have anything to do with your ilk' (because you already go to the church of your choice and you're not interested in the sect, or you think the sectarian is misguided, wrong, scary or plain satanic) and the sectarian would put his foot in your door, wrestle his way inside against your strongest protests and demand some tea, banging you in the head with the teapot, you would fall onto your knees, asking for forgiveness?

That sounds... scary.

Ah, but your *sister* was once part of their little sect, wasn't she. And she was killed in mysterious ways (rumours of 'dark lords' and 'prophecies' and 'ritual killings' abound, which scared you even more, but you couldn't go to the police, could you? Because who would believe you? They'd throw you in the looney bin!) and her kid just appeared on your doorstep with a note telling you that if you didn't care for the kid evil, even death, would befall you and your family, but you couldn't *keep* the kid, because he belonged to the sect, and they would come and teach him in the ways of the sect when he was eleven. And they did come and taught him, oh God, how they taught him, and oh God, every time they come they force themselves into your house even though you tell them they are not *welcome* and then they attack your only son and you just want them out, out, OUT!! Leave me ALONE!!!

But what *really* matters of course is that you graciously offer the creepy, scary, dangerous weirdo some tea. 

Personally, I'd probably try to knife the guy. It would be illegal of course (I live in Europe, where weapons are forbidden and attacking burglars and such ilk falls under 'manslaughter', strangely enough, and not 'selfdefence'). But those who live in the USA could safely shoot Dumbledore for unlawful entry. You, mr and mrs Dursley, are after all the owners and occupants of the property and you have refused entry to Dumbledore. Harry is an underage dependent of the occupants and does not legally possess the right to invite into the house people who the owners/occupants have forbidden entry.

See, the Dursleys have the *right* to deny the entry of weird beardy guys in spangly robes in their own home. They do not live in Africa or Tibet or in a medieval monastry. They live in Britain in the 1990's. 
And as for 'asking forgiveness', if Dumbledore truly cared so much about manners, he would've apologised to the Dursleys long ago for dumping the kid on their doorstep without so much as a by-your-leave. Forcing your little problems on other people, letting them muddle though for ten years without help or even caring if they are willing or able to care for your problem, and then barging into their lives again, disrupting it yet *again*, letting your minion, pardon, your *groundskeeper* hex a pigstail onto your only child which has to be *surgically removed* and then have to gall to complain about not being offered *refreshments*, surely that must be the hight of rudeness.

In my humble opinion, of course.

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