Why did Snape remove *that* memory? Was:Taking memories out of your head?

[Ceridwen]

No: HPFGUIDX 164158

Sherry:
> I'm always puzzled by the idea that Harry, who has never really 
known his parents, needs to learn not to idolize them.  Why?  Why 
shouldn't he keep his view of them?  This is in a general sense I am 
asking the question, not rejecting the obvious plot device, because 
it's unchangeable.  But what is good about making a kid, during a 
terrible year in his life no less, learn that his parents weren't all 
he thought?  His view of his parents had actually helped him through 
some things.  Why remove another source of pride and strength from 
the poor kid?

Ceridwen:
My mother was an orphan.  She lost her mother when she was two, and 
her father when she was nine.  She was raised in an orphanage from 
the time of her mother's death.

She thought her parents would have been perfect.  She never could 
understand it when other kids fought their parents, and she never 
understood the normal teenage rebellion which prepares children for 
leaving the nest.  This was not good for her as a parent, because she 
could never see why I might disagree with her.  After all, I was 
lucky, I had my mother.  She would have given anything to have had 
hers, and she would have always dutifully obeyed both of her parents 
out of gratitude that she had them with her, if the only hadn't died.

This attitude would certainly impact Harry as a parent, but that 
wouldn't be within the story we're reading.

For the story we have, Harry's strength is Love.  The thread about 
forgiveness has given several definitions of forgiveness, and the 
ways that it would strengthen Harry and his Love power if he would be 
able to forgive Snape.  One thing that I do think is necessary for 
Harry's forgiveness, not just dismissal, would be understanding of 
Snape's situation.

If Snape's parents were the screaming man and the cringing woman, 
Harry doesn't need to think that Snape was lucky to have had his 
parents and that he threw away that good fortune.  He would need to 
understand how parents can sometimes disappoint a child.  Believing 
that is own parents would have been perfect puts a barrier in the way 
to that sort of understanding, in my opinion.  Seeing his father as 
flawed and human, with weaknesses as well as strengths, helps Harry 
to understand that no one is perfect.  Because it seems to me that he 
may think that because his parents were perfect, then everyone could 
be.

Harry was allowed the opportunity that other children who have not 
lost their parents, to see his father as flawed and human, at a time 
when children normally see their parents as less than perfect.  
Glimpsing James and friends in the Pensieve was the closest thing 
orphaned Harry had ever seen of his father and mother.  I don't count 
Dementor-induced recall as anything close: the situation was 
extrordinary.  I thought it was touching that he was able to see them 
at all, not just waving from photos, but moving, talking, being 
relaxed in themselves.

For Harry's inner development, not holding a picture of Perfect James 
and Perfect Lily in his mind will allow him to forgive himself for 
any action he may think of as unworthy of their sacrifice, or which 
he may think does not live up to their legacy.  The pressure is off 
of him to be as perfect as he believed his parents were before the 
Pensieve incident.  He is free to make mistakes and to learn from 
them, because his father, who looked like a royal prat in the 
Pensieve, grew up to become a loving husband and father, and a brave 
protector despite his mistakes.

So, I see several benefits to Harry's discovery about his father for 
coming of age.  It was a bitter disappointment at the time, but I 
think Harry did grow from it, and I think that he will continue to 
grow past the need for perfect parents and be able to be his own man.

Ceridwen.