OPEN: Ultimate and Last Bragging Rights by TigerPatronus

[Sydney]

No: HPFGUIDX 171820

Okay, I'll make a fool of myself:

Compulsory Questions:

1. Will Harry die and stay dead at the end of HPDH?
'Die' yes, stay dead, no.  By 'die', I mean, he'll go to a 'Land of
the Dead' type-thing like all good Hero-questers, but it will be in
some provisional way.  Draught of Living Death?  Anyhow.. out on a
limb, because Harry's kind of a Christ-figure, he'll be 'resurrected'
through the Room of Love.  Bonus prediction:  because JKR and Joss
Whedon share a brain, Harry will be peaceful and happy in the land of
the dead, but have to return to this vale of tears to live out his
natural life.

2. Will Voldemort die and stay dead at the end of HPDH?
Yes

3. Excluding Harry and Voldemort, who will be the most prominent
character to die and stay dead?

Guh... Snape.  Aargh.  I'm not 100% sure, but pretty sure.

4. From HBP (p125, American Hardcover), in the shop while the trio
were listening with Extendable Ears, what did Draco show Borgin that
scared him?

The Dark Mark, why not. 

5. Assuming Hogwarts reopens as a school, who will return as a
student, which means enrolled in classes whether or not they attend
the classes (answer yes or no for each):

a. Harry? yes
b. Draco? no
c. Hermione? yes
d. Luna? yes
e. Ron? yes
f. Neville? yes
g. Ginny? yes


6. Which will be the most prominent couple to marry, if any, during
the time period covered in DH, excluding any epilogue?

Bill and Fleur

7. Who will be the unusual person who performs magic for the first
time "very late in life?"

Dudley

8. Assuming Hogwarts reopens as a school, who will be the:
a. Head Boy?
Harry
b. Head Girl?
Hermione
c. DADA Instructor?
a new character, as usual. I'm dying to see what happens when the
curse is broken.  
d. Potions Master or Mistress?
Slughorn
e. Headmaster or -mistress?
McGonagall

9. Where do Snape's ultimate loyalties lie?

Dumbledore, duh. 

10. Identify the seven Horcruxes.

a. Gryffindor's sword (poo on JKR for shooting down my Sorting Hat
theory!)
b. Riddle's Diary
c. The Ring
d. The Locket from Grimmauld Place
e.Ravenclaw's wand
f. Hufflepuff's Cup
g. Harry


Alternate 1. What are Snape's patronus and boggert?

Patronus: a Phoenix.  It has changed at some point-- either when he
initially 'turned' back in the day, or after he killed Dumbledore.  I
love Wynnleaf's guess of an Augurey Phoenix.
Boggart: Lily being killed because of him.
Alternate 2. What is behind the locked door at the Department of
Mysteries in the Ministry of Magic?
Love.  Didn't Dumbledore tell us that?  If it's like a symbolic
thing.. uh... my brain's stuck on giant hearts.  Didn't she actually
use giant man-eating brains to represent thoughts?  Okay, a giant,
man-eating dove.

Predictions (10 points each / 50 points total):

Make 5 predictions not covered in the Compulsory Question section.

1. Because HP is basically an elaboration of "The Little White Horse":
We will revisit the Salazar Slytherin/Goderic Gryffindor split,
discover hidden complications, and redress an ancient wrong. Also,
we'll find out Goderic wasn't as good, nor Salazar as bad, as history
likes to record. Out on a limb: it was Goderic who enslaved the House
Elves. cf. also "Daughter of Time"-- a revisionist view of Richard the
Third. The chapter title "Cat, Rat, and Dog" in PoA may be a reference
to this.
2. The "Life Debt" works like the DADA Curse-- it's 'Coincidence
Magic' that does not cause events on its own, but somehow results in
artistic tableaux of exquisite irony that highlights everyone's
characters.  Let's say it's the reverse of the DADA curse: rather than
arranging events that 'bring out the worst' in the victim, it arranges
events that 'bring out the best' in them.  In Snape's case, his love
for Lily entangled him in saving James.  What the best is in Peter
Pettigrew I have no idea.
3. The magical emphasis will be on transportation, signifying freedom
of movement, action, and choice. Apparition will be the recurring
magic, as love potions were to HBP (I have this
developmental-psychology theory about the series).  Harry will inherit
Sirius' motorcycle and will ride around looking badass and disturbing
the neighbourhood.  Two for one predictions:  Harry will also inherit
Sirius' little flat that he mentioned, which is in Notting Hill and
now worth 1.2 million pounds.
4. Emmeline Vance is alive!!
5. Because JKR likes her parallel structures-- Harry will be helped by
some mysterious personage, and have theories about who it is. When the
person is revealed, it will be with words along the lines of, "It
wasn't Lupin. It wasn't even Dumbledore. It was Snape." And then the
chapter will end. Dun dun duuuuuun!  There will be a Shrieking-Shack
type funhouse reversal, with Harry as Snape, and Snape as Sirius,
where Harry goes CAPSLOCK about how obviously Snape is EVIL!!  The
part of Crookshanks will be played in tonight's performance by Fawkes
the Phoenix.

Too vague to count as an actual prediction:  6. Because all these
kinds of stories end with this kind of thing, the main climax will be
WTF? explosion of symbolism and vagueness about how great Love just
kind of dissolves evilness. cf. "A Wrinkle in Time", "The Owl
Service", every HP book so far but particularly OoP.  The actual
whiz-bangery will be completely unpredictable and not make much sense.
7. Because HP is like one of those seemingly idiotic tunes that
nevertheless still make you mist up and smile and you can't get out of
your head: the credits will roll to "Put a Little Love in Your Heart".
Starring John Denver as Ron Weasley, and Olivia Newton John as Lily
Potter. And ABBA as themselves: http://tinyurl.com/2mqg4k (that's a
youtube link, be warned the song will be in your head for the next
three days).
8. Madame Pince is not a Prince.  Come on, people, that doesn't even
count as an anagram.

Sydney-- wrong I'd say on about 80% of these, but not on Snape's
loyalties.