Petunia's Dirty Little Secret

[Talisman]

No: HPFGUIDX 170025

(All citation is to the U.S., Scholastic version of the books.)

I would make the requisite facile apology for not having read every
Petunia post on the list--in the off-chance that I'm being repetitive-
-but you'd know I wasn't sincere. I value my sanity too highly.

If someone has said this all before, by all means send them my way.
I might enjoy the conversation.

Now to the problem at hand:

What *is* our horse-faced housekeeper hiding under her apron?

Even before the evidentiary enticements of OoP and HBP, readers
wondered about Petunia. Would she be Rowling's magical late-bloomer?
What was in the letter DD left with baby Harry, that would induce her
to take him in, against her every inclination?

As the series finale looms ever closer, these inferious questions
rise again, compounded now by the revelations of Books 5 and 6.

People are revisiting the matter of her magical potential--in spite
of Rowling's pointed clarification that Petunia is 100% certified
Muggle meat--not even allowed the proximity of Squibdom.
http://www.jkrowling.com/textonly/en/news_view.cfm?id=80

Alternatively, there has been wild speculation that she is an
(erstwhile?) member of the Order of the Phoenix, rearing the hateful
brat in exchange for DD's keeping that *awful truth* from Vernon.

St. Mungo forefend!

Though I am long on record as encouraging readers to subject Ms.
Rowling's utterances to the highest of critical scrutinies, I think
we must content ourselves that Petunia hasn't so much as a magical
corpuscle in her bony little body.

And, far from being justified by the text, the idea that she ever
served in Dumbledore's ranks requires readers to contort themselves
in unseemly acts of analytical acrobatics.

To the contrary, the evidence to date fairly shrieks that Auntie was
a Death Eater.

Consider the following:

The meager *parenting* Petunia offers Harry is clearly gained by
powerful coercion.

Although our story is shot through with the thespian antics of
espionage, Petunia's unconcealed loathing for Harry is no ruse.

Not that Vernon needs any encouragement to be nasty, but it is just
as clear that, for more than 15 years, Petunia has perpetrated myriad
acts of cruelty, petty and otherwise, in satisfaction of her own base
emotions.

Nor is Petunia compelled by any fear of incurring Vernon's
displeasure. It is She who has the final word in the Dursley
household.

>From Vernon's demonstrated dread of raising *the Potter issue* with
his wife in Book 1 (5, 7), to his rapid acquiescence when she quashes
his ouster of Harry in Book 5 (40), it is clear who calls the shots.

In OoP, Dumbledore acknowledges that Petunia never loved Harry, and
only took him in "
grudgingly, furiously, unwillingly, bitterly
"
(836).

The only question, is *why* she performs this repugnant office.

Clearly, DD has some hold over her, something stemming from the past,
something powerful enough that it usually controls her-- in equipoise
against her deep hatred of the boy.

And, when events finally threaten to break this established
compliance, he can regain control with but the cryptic
remonstration: "Remember my last!" (OoP 40).

So just what *was* in that *last* little missive he sent to Petunia

but not to Vernon?

I assert that it was an explanation of how Dumbledore was aware, and
had ample evidence to prove, that Petunia had collaborated with Lord
Voldemort; that she was literally, or for all practical purposes, a
Death Eater, and that, if she did not comply with his wish that she
take young Harry in, he would see to it that she spend the rest of
her days in Azkaban Fortress, under the watchful eyes of the
dementors.

Petunia's reaction to the news of the dementor attack in OoP is
telling in this regard:

"De-men-tors," said Harry slowly and clearly. "Two of them."

"And what the ruddy hell are dementors?" [Vernon asked.]

"They guard the wizard prison, Azkaban," said Aunt Petunia. (OoP 31)

She didn't say, "Hang on, I've heard that word before..." or search
her memory for so much a moment. Nor did she have any trouble
instantly recalling the prison name.

Rowling has Harry reflect--not only on the extraordinary occasion of
Petunia's reference to things wizardly, but:
"He was astonished that she had remembered this scrap of information
about the magical world for so long
" (OoP 32).

In fact, she more than *remembered* this piece of trivia, it flew out
of her lips before she could slap her hand over her mouth.

Nor can we explain her memory as a function of the dementor's
inherent ghastliness, for in this regard, Petunia knows too little.

While indicating exactly where they work, she has no idea of their
special horrors.

It is not until *after* Harry explains that dementors not only
suck "all the happiness" out of you, but can also "suck the soul out
of your mouth" (OoP 34) that Petunia screams and starts shaking
Dudley as if hoping to still "hear his soul rattling around inside
him" (34).

Petunia knows what dementors are because of their relation to
Azkaban, and not the other way round.

In contrast to her fluid blurt of information, Petunia then *jerkily*
claims that her familiarity arises from hearing "that awful boy--
telling *her* about them--years ago" (OoP 32).

Harry assumes she is referring to his parents--maybe so. She has
already acknowledged, back in the hut on the rock, that Lily exposed
her both to bits of the magical world, and to James. Claiming them as
her source of information is the best spin she could possibly put on
her curious announcement. Damage control.

But, that would mean that she overheard these, to an innocent
Petunia, necessarily irrelevant factoids, at a minimum, 14 years
earlier (before GH). Likely even more than that.

Thus, the reader is left with two possibilities: either Rowling is
trying to demonstrate that Auntie has a mind like a steel trap, or
the truth--regarding Petunia's heightened awareness of Azkaban--lies
elsewhere.

The force of implication is that Azkaban is a matter of intense
personal interest to Petunia; an interest that has persisted--
resulting in her frequent review of the subject--lo, these past 14
years.

Sans doute, Petunia *has* brooded about Azkaban, and it's dolorous
guards, every single day, whenever she feels the impulse to rid
herself of Harry. The encouragement that makes her grit her teeth
and trudge on, is the prospect of wasting her exemplary housekeeping
talents scrubbing the grout in that wretched wizarding goal,
forevermore.

This explains Dumbledore's somewhat superfluous explanation to young
Riddle, that by entering the magical world, Riddle subjects himself
to wizarding law (HBP 273).

No rational reader would have felt a draft if DD had been less
specific. We have no reason to challenge the Wizarding World's right
to punish RiddleMort.

And, though Riddle was undoubtedly a very bad boy, he wasn't stupid
enough--a fortiori after DD demonstrated a preternatural awareness,
and disapproval, of Riddle's orphanly misdeeds-- to screw the pooch
by indiscretion in his subsequent schoolboy crimes, which had risen
to multiple homicides before graduation.

It's not so much that it was *wrong* to focus on the wizarding social
contract, as it was over abundant. It smacks of the foundational
information Rowling needed to lay in Book 5, to justify events to be
revealed in Book 7.

("You need what's in there [OoP] if I'm going to play fair for the
reader in the resolution in book seven." Mugglenet/Leaky Cauldron
interview, Part II. http://www.accio-quote.org/articles/2005/0705-
tlc_mugglenet-anelli-2.htm )

Muggle or no, if Petunia intruded into the WW in service of Lord
Voldemort, she brought herself within the jurisdiction of the MoM,
and remains subject to imprisonment in Azkaban.

The idea of Muggles in wizarding institutions is also raised where,
in Chapter 22, we find that two Muggles are in St. Mungo's for
emergency services, thanks to Willy Windershins's biting doorknobs
(OoP 490).

These less radical examples serve the same end: to bring the upcoming
notion, of Petunia in Azkaban, within fair bounds.

Additionally, Rowling tells us that Muggle-borns are as bad as
Muggles.

"As far as somebody like Lucius Malfoy is concerned, for instance, a
Muggle-born is as 'bad' as a Muggle."
(J.K. Rowling Official Site, F.A.Q. section.
http://www.jkrowling.com/textonly/en/faq_view.cfm?id=58 ).

Yet, she also tells us that Muggle-borns can be Death Eaters * in
rare circumstances*
(Edinburgh Book Festival, Sunday, August 15, 2004.
http://www.accio-quote.org/articles/2004/0804-ebf.htm )

The logic follows that, in rare circumstances, a Muggle can be a
Death Eater, too.

So far, we have seen no such example. Now this distillation sits
among us, all loaded and ready, the way Chekhov liked it.

Then to, let us reconsider Rowling's "indiscretion" from her 2004
News item, more fulsomely:

Is Aunt Petunia a Squib?
Good question. No, she is not, but—[Laughter]. No, she is not a
Squib. She is a Muggle, but—[Laughter]. You will have to read the
other books. You might have got the impression that there is a little
bit more to Aunt Petunia than meets the eye, and you will find out
what it is. She is not a squib, although that is a very good guess.
Oh, I am giving a lot away here. I am being shockingly indiscreet.
(J.K. Rowling Official Site: News August 15, 2004
http://www.jkrowling.com/textonly/en/news_view.cfm?id=80 )

If Petunia is a consummate Muggle--which I don't doubt--and not a
Squib at all, then why is *squib* a *very good guess?*

I'll tell you why: because like a Squib, Death Eater Petunia has
lurked on the threshold of the magical world.

Recall Rowling's description of a Squib's lot:

"Squibs 
 are often doomed to a rather sad kind of half-life 
 they
will be exposed to, if not immersed in, the wizarding community, but
can never truly join it. Sometimes they find a way to fit; Filch has
carved himself a niche at Hogwarts and Arabella Figg operates as
Dumbledore's liaison between the magical and Muggle worlds.
(J. K. Rowling Official Site: Extra Stuff
http://www.jkrowling.com/textonly/en/extrastuff_view.cfm?id=19 )

Likewise, DE!Petunia carved herself a niche in the periphery of the
magical world, as a Muggle-laison and operative for Voldemort.

While not a Squib, herself, Petunia has behaved in a squibish manner;
ergo, squib is a toasty warm guess.

The earlier relationship with our villain also explains why Petunia
is the only one in the kitchen, besides Harry, who has "an inkling of
what Lord Voldemort being back might mean" (OoP 38).

And she is demonstrably terrified.

Once a DE, always a DE--or exit feet first.

It's a marvelous Rock and a Hard Place: Dumbledore will slip her a
one-way ticket to Azkaban if she reneges on the deal, and Voldemort
will whack her for flipping sides.

With regard to Petunia, what more could a reader ask for?

Those who imagine that her odd *flush* in HBP bespeaks a sudden flood
of maternal feelings for our hero should remove the rosy specs and
review, not only the long history of maltreatment rained on Harry
through the years, but the fact that Petunia has just been called an
abusive and deplorable parent--in regard to both Harry and Dudley--
and that DD's *request* of another (especially dangerous) year's
compliance tacitly raises her guilt, obligation, and penalty for
lapse, right there in the sanctity of her own living room.

Anger and humiliation are two time-honored reasons for going red in
the face, and much more in keeping with the course of events.

Additionally, Petunia having such a change of heart would be a
massive step toward redemption.

Rowling doesn't seem to want to redeem the Dursleys:

'I like torturing them,' said Rowling. 'You should keep an eye on
Dudley. It's probably too late for Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon.
(Cinescape interview, 16 November 2000: http://www.accio-
quote.org/articles/2000/1100-cinescape-garcia2.htm )

Okay, you say. That was 2000, this is 2007, and maybe Rowling
changed her mind.

Will the old girl get the last minute *reprieve?* Odds are against
it. Ambiguity has not been organically *built* into Petunia's
behavior to support a *justified* alternative view. The force of the
textual evidence is that she took Harry in under compulsion and has
hated every minute of it.

In OoP, Rowling interjects the howler immediately before Petunia
orders Vernon to let Harry stay. This is appropriate technique: we
are given a credible motivational basis to explain why Petunia would
do such a *nice* thing.

Therefore, her character isn't changed in respect to her long-
standing loathing for Harry; indeed, we are shown that she must be
threatened into compliance with her earlier agreement.

(And, of course, Harry is treated, thereafter, as if Number 4 were
his prison.)

Between this series-consistent behavior and her hot cheeks in HBP we
are given no causal basis, whatsoever, to explain a change in
character, let alone such a profound one as *motherly feelings* would
entail.

Furthermore, redemption asks that her past sins not be *too*
egregious (say, helping to axe Lily), yet, if they do not warrant
dire punishment, we have no plausible explanation for her fixation
with Azkaban, and so, no inducement sufficient to compel to her to
act against her nature, by taking Harry in.

In short, it would make a hash of things.

The other way round is so much more felicitous. Why not squash her
like a bug, and enjoy it?

Then there is the matter of her pathological cleaning obsession.
Lady Macbeth springs to mind: she rubs and rubs (in this case the
kitchen surfaces) but the spot remains.

Or should we say the mark?

Does Petunia have some interesting body art on her left forearm?

Possibly. For all we know she eschews short-sleeved cocktail
dresses. Alternatively, DD might have cleaned her up. Wouldn't do to
excite young Harry, prematurely.

But I think the better answer is that she never had the Dark Mark,
regardless of her affiliation with Voldemort.

After all, the Dark Mark is used to call the Death Eaters to their
Master's side. Petunia couldn't apparate, and Voldemort would hardly
wait around while she hopped a bus.

There is just no point in branding her with a summoning device.

Even if she made it to a meeting, she would have caused a furor among
the blood-elect, who would never have tolerated a Muggle presence in
the circle of brotherhood.

Voldemort could have no possible interest in sowing such unrest. Nor
would he wish to expose his followers or meeting places to a pariah's
scrutiny.

More likely he dealt with her at a long arm's length, holding his
nose the whole while.

Finally, Voldemort cares about symbolism. Petunia may have been
useful, but he wouldn't want his elite identifier gracing her foul
Muggle hide.

No, Petunia doesn't wear a physical Dark Mark.

Still, her perpetual scouring is the external symptom of an inner
mark. Her inept efforts to erase an interior filth that soap can't
touch: the guilty residue of her transgressions.

And so we see the perfectly charming noose of Petunia's plot arc,
drawing to a close.

Some remaining questions of interest are:

What exactly did Petunia do for Voldemort?

Did she play a role in Godric's Hollow?

Will she, in a desperate attempt to re-ingratiate herself, turn on
Harry when Voldemort comes knocking? (Especially if she's learned
that Dumbledore is defunct?)

Talisman, saying, let's have her go out after a *last vile move* that
sets up the delightfully thorough smack down.