Changes I would make.

[eggplant107]

No: HPFGUIDX 177765

Random832 <random832 at ...> wrote:

> you DARE presume to tell me what
> I did or did not visualize 

To quote Harry "Yes I dare!"

There is another thing I'd change, when Harry dives into the pond for
the sword the book says the chain on the Horcrux was blocking his
windpipe, but as he was under water already that would seem to make
little difference. I would say it was blocking his carotid artery. The
carotid brings blood to the brain and if blocked can make someone
black out very quickly. Wrestlers call it "the sleeper hold".

 Eggplant