Lupin and Tonks WAS: I am so happy. There is a gay - Triumph & Tragedy

[Carol]

No: HPFGUIDX 178289

SSSusan wrote:
> > But.  But.  But didn't canon show us a Lupin who finally
**allowed** himself to love Tonks fully after Harry yelled at him? 
<SNIP> In short, I don't think it was unrequited love at all on
Tonks's part.  I think Lupin just felt he could be nothing other than
a burden or an embarrassment to Tonks and any offspring they might 
have, and he ran from the love he felt for her for that reason for a 
very long time.
> <SNIP>
> 
Alla responded:
> 
> I do not know, dear. Trust me, I like your view and want you to be 
completely right on this one, I really do.
> 
> As I said, sure I could buy Lupin's insecurities in HBP and could
take him denying himself true happiness and people trying to convince
him, etc.
> 
> I am afraid that in DH his running away again is a bit too much that
I could believably see true love there, which again does not mean that
you are incorrect, just picture in my head.
> 
> I guess, insecurities or not, I just cannot see man who truly loves
 the woman he **just married** much rather join the Trio on the
horcruxes hunt.
> 
> I have no doubt that he was truly happy when Teddy was born. I do
not think he hated Tonks or anything like that, and I want to believe
that he finally allowed himself to **love** her, but I just do not know.
> 
> I felt so sad when I read about them both lying there dead, snif,
but did Remus die in love?
> 
> I do not know.
> 
> Alla

Carol responds:

Here we have an excellent example of canon that's still open to
interpretation. I tend to agree with SSS in this instance, but Alla's
view is also valid, and there may be still other valid interpretations
(as well as other points on both sides that weren't presented here).

I sincerely hope that JKR *does not* state her views on whether Lupin
really loved Tonks or was talked into it. I don't want her to tell the
reader how to view the characters or what Lupin "really" thought.

It's fine to tell us who Neville married (if she could just make up
her mind and give them a place to live a little closer to Hogwarts).
But I wish she'd leave the characters' thoughts and motives alone. Let
us decide for ourselves, for example, how capable of reformation Draco
is and why DD hesitated so long to fight Grindelwald. 

I know that others see JKR as the ultimate authority on everything
Potter and are eager for mor information, but I say, now that the
books are published, she should leave them to the readers. As for not
answering questions that she's asked, if she stopped having public
appearances, she wouldn't be asked questions. And she can limit any
questions she answers on her website to "factual" matters. (I
absolutely *do not* want to be told whose spell killed Ariana. OTOH,
an explanation about potentially fatal spells other than AK might
clear up some confusion. Then again, given her "explanation" of
curses, hexes, and jinxes, maybe not.) 

Please, JKR. Let us continue to "just picture it in our heads," as
Alla put it. Don't give us everything that *you've* pictured in your
head and call it the correct interpretation. If it's not in the books,
it's not canon. If it's in the books, it should be subject to
interpretation. And that goes especially for the thoughts and
motivations of characters other than Harry.

Re DD's sexuality, some posters are complaining that he wasn't shown
to be gay. Surely, the fact that he's 115 or 150 (depending on whether
you believe the old interviews or the website, which matches better
with 107-year-old Auntie Myrtle knowing the young DD but nevertheless
gets his death date wrong) and the fact that Harry perceives DD as
someone who was born old (there's a statement to that effect in DH
though of course I'm paraphrasing wildly) has something to do with how
he's depicted? And if he were openly gay, wouldn't JKR have been
accused of stereotyping, what with the blue boots and knitting
patterns and colorful robes?

Carol, hoping that at least we never find out "what really happened"
to Aberforth's goat