Lupin's behavior (Was: CHAPDISC: DH11, The Bribe)

[a_svirn]

No: HPFGUIDX 180632

> zgirnius:
> What, then, to you, is a coward? My dictionary calls it someone who 
> shows "disgraceful" fear. This seems a rather subjective call to 
> make, whether any given exhibition of fear is 'disgraceful' or not. 
> (And, leaving a new, and pregnant, bride just like that, without 
> discussing it with her, and because it is "for her good", strikes 
me 
> as an action I *would* call 'disgraceful'). I would not distinguish 
> between the two, exept to note that 'acting out of fear' is not 
> insulting, whereas 'coward' is. I agree that Harry was rude, and 
also 
> believe he nailed the substance of the situation.

a_svirn:
So it is disgraceful, then, to place someone else's good above your 
own? To sacrifice your life for the cause you believe just, and to 
protect someone whom you believe the only hope for success of that 
cause? To place your loved one's safety before your own needs? Well, 
you may think it disgraceful, I don't. Obviously we'll have to agree 
to disagree on that one. I might add though that I was surprised to 
no end that Harry had the gall to call someone who risked his life on 
a number of occasions to ensure Harry's safety a coward. 

As for the "substance of this situation", what exactly Harry did nail 
down? Setting aside the fact that it was none of his business, and 
the fact that we don't even know (and Harry most definitely didn't)
whether Lupin consulted Tonks or not (though I inclined to agree that 
he didn't), what is so cowardly in abandoning her for her own good? 
It would be cowardly thing to do, if it Lupin was lying, and using it 
as an excuse to go for some lark with the Trio. But *that* was a 
monstrous lie. Not only Lupin's motives were perfectly valid, his 
offer was perfectly reasonable and not in the least daredevil. 
Whatever Lupin's weaknesses were this was the charge one couldn't 
level against him. 

> zgirnius:
> If he was acting on behalf of the WW, why is it that all his 
> explanations of his actions were about Tonks and the baby? Even if 
> you are right, surely poor Harry could be forgiven for thinking 
that 
> 1) Lupin was acting for the reasons he stated, and 2) it was OK for 
> him to express opinions about matters Lupin insisted on bringing up 
> in conversation.

a_svirn:
Actually it was the other way round. Lupin came to Harry to offer him 
his help. Harry was the one who insisted to bring Tonks into the 
conversation. 

> zgirnius:
> I'm sorry, but anyone who rants about their relationship to 
someone, 
> cannot complain when that someone decides to offer his or her 
> opinion. I agree these are deeply private and personal matters, but 
> the way to avoid the intrusion of others into them, is not to air 
> them in public.

a_svirn:
You seem to forget that it was Harry who brought up the topic. And 
flinging wild accusation at someone who is already at his wit's end, 
isn't the same thing as offering an opinion. 

 
> > a_svirn:
> > I don' see it. Lupin said that Tonks would be OK. Which means 
that 
> he 
> > had thought it over and concluded that she wasn't in any 
immediate 
> > danger. And what sort of danger she would be while staying with 
her 
> > mother and under the Fidelius protection, anyway?
> 
> zgirnius:
> Let's see. Maybe she'd get all depressed and not be able to do 
magic, 
> because her new husband had left her without so much as a by your 
> leave?

a_svirn:
So it's OK for her to become depressed, but for Lupin to be 
distraught is disgraceful? 

> zgirnius: 
> Anyway - was Andromeda under Fidelius? I don't recall reading that, 
> and it makes little sense that Ted left if she was. I thought her 
> safety consisted of her undeniably pure, Black blood.

a_svirn:
We are told the she is safe. Since no one has ever contradicted it I 
think we can take it as a given. Whether it was fidelius or other 
charms doesn't really matter.