FILK: Doxy from Biloxi
Caius Marcius
coriolan at coriolan_cmc.yahoo.invalid
Sat Jul 1 15:55:43 UTC 2006
Doxy from Biloxi
To the tune of Merle Haggard's Okie from Muskogee
http://country.mididb.com/merlehaggard/
Dedicated to Ginger
NOTE: According to Newt Scamander's text, Doxies generally live in
Northern Europe and America, preferring colder climates. Unknown to
the Potterverse till now is the fact that some decades ago, a small
group of Doxies migrated to the Gulf Coast region of Mississippi, and
established a thriving community. Years of warm humid climate,
Southern hospitality, and mint julep have gradually civilized these
Doxies to the point where they now consider themselves as "beings"
rather than "beasts", and look askance upon the practices of their
less sophisticated Northern cousins, not to mention the antics of
such closely-related species as fairies and pixies.
Although they generally shun the limelight, one of the Southern
Doxies has agreed to explain the differences between themselves and
the more familiar Northern Doxies:
A SOUTHERN DOXY:
We don't haunt old mansions in Biloxi;
We don't break our teeth on tapestries
We don't die from Doxycide on carpets;
Or get served in no snackboxes by Weasleys.
I'm proud to be a Doxy from Biloxi,
A place where former pests puff out their chests
We don't act like fairies straight off the fruit farm
Or those Pixie chicks, a species we detest
We don't fly at folks in fits of fury
Venom's not a thing that we deploy
We don't let our kids hang out in curtains,
Or get written up by Newt or Gilderoy
And I'm proud to be a Doxy from Biloxi,
A species that has but a single "X"
If we would be "beings" we must have culture
And stop acting like those Grimmauld Place rejects
Quintapeds may still have quarrels in clannish warfare
Ghouls and Grindlylows can be quite rude
Footsteps flee the rough old hippocampus,
But we Doxies keep respectful attitudes
So I'm a Dixie Doxy from Biloxi,
That's why I'm singing this doxology
We are no longer beasts, but we're fantastic
In Biloxi, Mississippi, USA
- CMC
HARRY POTTER FILKS
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm
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