Calling the argument ridiculous, moved from MAIN

[Carol]

Carol earlier:
> <SNIP>
> As far as I'm concerned, calling my post ridiculous doesn't
*challenge* my ideas. It insults *me.* By all means, challenge my
argument by presenting rational counterarguments and counter my canon
with counterexamples. By all means state that you disagree with me and
why (that is, make clear which specific point you disagree with). But
please don't resort to ad hominem tactics, especially since you're a
List Elf and need to set an example for other posters.
> 
> 
> Alla:
> 
> We disagree on that - that calling argument ridiculous  is ad
hominem tactic. Actually, no strike that – it may insult you, but I
believe that there should be a balance between what list member may
consider offensive and what should be considered offensive. <snip>
 
> I cannot predict which word you will take offensively and vice
versa. <snip>

Carol:
Oh, I think you can safely predict that someone who has spent time
presenting reasoned arguments and supporting them with canon is not
going to take kindly to having her arguments labeled as ridiculous,
whether they've been properly understood or not. 

And I should add, speaking as a former college English teacher, that
calling an argument ridiculous is considerably as a means of refuting
that argument than providing reasoned counterarguments and evidence to
support them. Calling an argument ridiculous doesn't make it
ridiculous any more than calling Snape evil makes him evil.

Alla: 
> I AM sorry that it insulted you. 

Carol:
Thank you. And I'm sorry that we have to have this public, erm,
disagreement, but I think it's important, especially given that others
will follow your example, that we determine whether it's acceptable to
call someone's argument ridiculous or not. (I think we agree that it's
not acceptable to characterize a fellow poster as Umbridge, as also
happened to me recently, but that poster has apologized for her
misunderstanding of my post and for her rudeness, and I've publicly
accepted her apology.)

I am not sorry for using that word and I will use the word as relates
to argument I am challenging as I see fit.

Carol:
Well, we'll see what the List Elves have to say with regard to
acceptable use of that word. As an argumentative tactic, it proves
nothing. It's more effective (and easier), IMO, to prove that an
argument is *wrong* than that it's "ridiculous," which remains the
opinion of the poster. And civility is always more effective than
contemptuous dismissal of someone else's argument, again, IMO.
> 
> I am trying to be careful with the words, as I said I do not do that
often, but TRUST ME, I struggled to find the word . 

Carol:
Struggled to find the word "ridiculous"? why not simply say that you
disagree, state the point that you disagree with, and explain why?

Carol, who disagrees with Alla on this and many other matters but
would not think of insulting her ideas by labeling them as ridiculous