Birthdays and such...

[Doreen Rich]

> Jen (who is glad it's not her birthday anymore, but hopes she gets 
a 
> gift soon - and wonders if her husband had intended on giving her 
one 
> for Mothers' Day any time this year...)
> 
> (did that sound incredibly selfish?)
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awww ... No, it did not sound incredibly selfish... it sounded 
incredibly RUDE on your husband's part. What you need to do is get 
your little girl and yourself all dressed up... and go out to the 
mall and buy yourself a combined birthday/Mother's Day gift ... let 
your little girl pick out the Mother's Day gift. (your husband is NOT 
obligated to get you one from him ... you are NOT his mommy... but he 
could have, at least, taken your daughter to get you one)Then, take 
your little girl out to eat at a nice restaurant. Whether or not you 
invite your husband along is up to you. ha ha ha :) 

I used to take my son to the Hallmark Store, tell the clerk, "$20 or 
less..." and walk around outside the store til they were finished. 
She would "shop" with him, then help him wrap it. He would stretch 
out on the floor and "sign" the cards. We did this every Mother's Day 
and Christmas and my birthday when he was little. I did end up with 
an odd assortment of things that he thought I had to have. The 
Hallmark people still talk about it! He is now almost 16. He 
remembers it fondly too.

I told all of my kids that I don't want anything for my birthday or 
Mother's Day except a card. They can usually manage that. Sometimes 
they surprise me with gifts, sometimes they don't. I don't wait any 
more to see who remembered and who forgot and spend the day in 
anticipation and disappointment. Carpe Diem!!! Take your own mother 
out on Mother's Day ... and if she doesn't live close, take someone 
out who probably never gets out otherwise... a lonely neighbor maybe.
On your birthday, rent a motel room with a jacuzzi ... get some 
candles, a bottle of wine, and a good book and some movies.(that is 
what I did on Mother's Day) Tell your  husband where you are spending 
the day. If he wants to join you ... fine ... if he doesn't, go 
prepared to have your own good day.

Doreen, who stopped depending on others to make her feel good