Heart of Hearing

[Aberforth's Goat]

David pricked up his ears,

> You mentioned it and it didn't get through, eh?  Could he be
> pretending it didn't get through?

Oh dear. Did we have to get onto this topic? <sighs & blushes>

I too have been informed that I suffer from a curious and
unfortunate form of dysacoustia. My syntagmatic circuitry seems
to have trouble processing clauses containing morphemes like
"kln," "vak-," "wsh-," "dish-," or even "kut" (generally in
conjunction with morphemes like "m htdog"). This particularly
pertains to sentences framed in the imperative and subjunctive
moods.

On the other hand, clauses which prominently employ morphemes
like "book," "thlo-," "bk," "hrr," or "ptter" - and any
clause enunciated within thirty seconds of the morpheme "sex" -
seem to employ a remarkably efficient decoding system.

I've found a simple solution: just join a future indicative
clause containing a combination of "sex" and one of the other
Class B morphemes to a conditional clause containing any Class A
morpheme, and the problem is solved. (A rapid, vertical
oscillation of the eyelashes might help.) I even suggested that
Oliver Sacks might like to write a book about my remarkable
difficulties. My wife said that would be fine, assuming it's a
very big book, and has a hard cover, and she can throw it at me.

Since Susan is normally a pacifist, this puzzled me a little.

Baaaaaa!

Aberforth's Goat (a.k.a. Mike Gray, who is feeling rather sexy
about having just washed all the breakfast and lunch dishes, pots
included, cleaned the stove and wiped off the table. Sue gave me
an odd look and asked whether Mecki would mind writing something
horrible at least four times a week.)

(If I can keep this rally going, I may soon be sitting at the
computer wearing a bow tie and a large, automatic pistol tucked
in the strings of frilly apron: the image of the postmodern
hunk.)
_______________________

"Of course, I'm not entirely sure he can read, so that
may not have been bravery...."