Problem

[sineadsiobhan]

Hey guys... 

This is going to be very OT.. but I hope it helps me fall asleep at 
least.

even though this post says its 1:50 am, at least to me. It's in 
actuality 3:00 am. Usually I fall asleep around 10 or 11 pm but today 
I went up to Cape Cod with my friend who lives there. We went out all 
night long and in the evening, around 8 or 9 she starts telling me 
about this website... I highly doubt it's appropriate to post the 
link here, about celebrity dead bodies. She tells me in graphic 
detail of the death scene in JFK jr's plane that she saw on the site. 
And then tells me about Marilyn Monroe's autopsy.

I have no problem about people telling me about dead bodies or 
dangling limbs. but then I went to her house and we checked e-mail. 
Soon after she lets her dogs in, she goes to the website and shows me 
Marilyn Monroe's autopsy photo (BTW Marilyn looks awful, completely 
different from photos from when she was alive). 

Here's the problem, I'm trying to think happy thoughts (my boyfriend, 
my dogs, schoolwork) to get my mind off it but I can't. Every picture 
changes back to the said photo above. It makes me afraid to sleep in 
the dark, and some times (like now) makes me afraid to sleep even. 
I've looked at other pictures with no problem at the bookstore 
because I go there in the day. I think I just hate sleeping alone 
when I see something that gross... a gross exploitation of a dead 
celebrity's body. It was the same for other things I read about, like 
Lizzie Borden's parents (I didn't know they had full size photos of 
them on the web and I accidentally saw the photos and I became 
insominac for the day) 

I had a tramautic experience with Madame Tussaud's Chamber of Horrors 
exhibit when I was seven and I couldn't sleep for days. 

Any solutions to my problem? No drugs please. Right now I'm really 
wishing my friends dog comes in and climbs on the bed to sleep with 
me. I wish I had something to cuddle when I'm sleeping. 

a very tired but can't sleep, 

Sinead