1)an apology, which I think is in order; 2)sex ed; 3)slash and 4)homosexuality

[Meira B]

First and Foremost - An Apology:

OK, first of all, please allow me to apologize to all those that I presumed 
to know their thoughts, and to those that I failed miserably in 
understanding the various points they were trying to get across.


~^~^~^~


Numero dos - Sexual Education:

(I am not an expert on child-psychology, and if someone has some facts which 
are contrary to what I say, then I'd lvoe to hear them out, these are my own 
opinions).

My own experience proves that the best way to explain things to children is 
at their own pace. I don't like the approach of the "ok, son, let's talk 
about the 'Birds and the Bees' now", just because it's not natural.

I do think that the kid should be encouraged to come with the questions to 
the parent.

When the kid does ask, I think that the basic "what goes where" should be 
explained. I also think that the level of explanation should be adjusted to 
the kid. Not because kids are stupid, but percisely because you don't want 
them losing interest in your explanation and turning to other sources of 
information.
Also, books that are specially written for the kid's age group are very 
helpful in this.

Later, the informational gaps can be filled with more advanced explanations 
and books.

Another reason why I believe in doing things at the kid's own rhythm (I hope 
that this is spelled right...) is because kids should be given their own 
time to grow up. Hurrying them through the process of childhood (and of 
being a teenager), is not a good thing. That, IMO (and please correct me if 
I'm wrong) is one of the reasons why violence has increased so much, why I 
see 13 year-old kids smoking and sometimes even drinking (and probably they 
use drugs when no one's around).

When it comes to supervising what the kid sees on TV or on the internet, on 
one hand parental supervision is a must. On the other hand, you (and they) 
don't want you to stand over their shoulder all the time. Which is what 
makes the whole thing really complicated...
Which is why colour-coding the fics, which is good, because not everybody 
likes angsty fics, or humorfics, the fics should have before the link to 
them is opened, a rating and a main ship description (in het *and* in slash 
fics), to take one problematic issue into account.


~^~^~^~


Point the Third - Slash:

There's nothing wrong with slash. Personally, the best HP fanfics I've read 
were slash. But there are people who don't like to slash HP.

There's a difference between slash and sex, it's not the same (As so many 
people pointed out around here).
Slash is a term that is used to define a ship (meaning, relationship) that 
occurs between two members of the same sex (that is, two men or two women), 
and a slash fic is not necessarily rated NC-17.

Some people might say "hey, why not" when confronted with the idea of a 
slash pairing in the HP fandom, and have the "hey, why not" reaction to 
NC-17 fics as well.

Some people might not like HP slashed or NC-17-ed. There's nothing wrong 
with that either. That does *not* make them homophobes, that simply means 
that gay characters do not fit into their own image of the Potterverse as 
they see it. Even though gay people *do* exist in the real world.

(like my own personal aversion to seeing Slytherins smoking. I don't think 
it's a very Slytherin-y thing to do. My aunt and one of my cousins smoke. I 
do not love them any less for that, I just wish they'd stop smoking).

~^~^~^~

Last (for now) - Homosexual-related issues (and please accept that I'm not 
trying to insult anyone here, I just use the word that means percisely that. 
'Homo' means 'same', and sexual, well, you know what *that* means *g*):

There's nothing wrong with being gay. There's nothing wrong with being 
straight either.
I would very much love to learn more about how one person turns out to be 
gay, whether it's because he decided to be gay, or because of genetics. I 
assumed that scientists were still arguing over this subject.

I think that hating others just because they are a bit different is stupid, 
but it's every person's right.
What isn't every person's right is to be violent about it.
If I borrow the ketchup example,
Some people prefer ketchup and others prefer mustard.
Those who prefer mustard have all the right to hate the ketchup-lovers, but 
what they can't do is force the ketchup-lovers to start consuming mustard 
instead of ketchup, or throw rotten tomatoes at them.
Ok, this was a bit silly, but I hope my point got across.

Wether it is by choice or by genes that can't be helped, homosexual men 
prefer other men. I don't know any other way to express this.
And my pizza topping analogy is not so wrong, if you think about it. Maybe 
my dislike of mushrooms is caused only by the enviroment's influence (though 
this is something that I really don't know, since both myself and my mother 
hate mushrooms with passion *g*), but the fact is that I prefer not to have 
mushrooms on my pizza.


~^~^~^~^~


Questions:

John: "I know, that's something of a strawman, but it's a relevant one."

[1] What's a "strawman"?

***

Barb wrote: "I firmly believe that scientists who have determined there is a 
genetic and/or biological basis to our orientations are correct,
based in part on a great deal of anecdotal testimony available
concerning the unchangeable nature of orientation (in addition to
the more scientific studies).  I also believe, however, that those
who claim orientation should not be protected under hate-crimes laws
because they call it a "choice" should see the hypocrisy in their
stand, when many of them are direct beneficiaries of their choice of
religion being protected under law."

[2] This is something that I'm not sure I understand entirely.
(hehe... y'see? I learned something... try and understand what someone says 
*before* replying on it, much trouble can be avoided this way. ^-^)


~^~^~^~^~


Comments:

[1] I will refrain from using things like "AARRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH....." in the 
future. Point taken and noted. Barbaric and unnecessary.

***

John: "I know that in general the_sabra_ style of speaking is more blunt and 
straightforward than most other English speakers"

[2] Yes it is *g*. But please take note that in Israel, there are three 
official languages: Hebrew, Arabic and English.

***

John: "I'm happy to provide links" (about homosexuality and genes)

[3] I'd love that, thanks.

***

[4] I said earlier: "John should really decide who's opinion matter to him."

To which John asked: "I don't understand this in the context. Can you 
explain, please?"

And my answer is:
My own, personal perspective on things is that I try to decide who's 
opinions matter to me and whose don't. I found that that makes me far less 
prone to being insulted and upset. Since I am not infallible, that does not 
always seem to work (as proven to my comment to Laura that she was 
patronizing me).




Meira.

"I hear, I admit, but I have a voice too, and for good or evil mine is the 
speech that cannot be silenced."
~ Heart of Darkness / Joseph Conrad ~

_________________________________________________________________
MSN 8: advanced junk mail protection and 2 months FREE*. 
http://join.msn.com/?page=features/junkmail