H/H Cliches (was Lori's Fanfic Question)

[Ebony Elizabeth]

No: HPFGUIDX 700

Been meaning to get to this.  Yes, I read fanfic--all genres, all 
ships, of all levels of writing ability, etc.  It was a summer 
entertainment even better than watching *Survivor*!

I'll just add to Kathleen's list: 
- Ginny confesses her love for Harry/Draco/Neville in her diary
- Harry dates Cho, who cheats on him, leading him to find true love 
in Hermione or Ginny, depending on the author's ship
- Ron, Hermione, and shooting stars (that one I don't get, but it's 
really common!)
- Harry Potter and Survivor (this has been done WAY too often--oh 
wait, once would have been way too often!)
- Snape dances to Britney Spears (also way too common--shudder)
- Snape and McGonagall fall in love
- Harry has a secret twin, also still alive
- Lavendar gives Hermione a makeover
- Hermione goes to another school dance and finds true love
==========
- A new girl (usually from America) plays matchmaker, and whoever 
isn't with Hermione ends up with her
- Hermione undergoes a complete personality change... I've seen her 
written as everything from CA valley girl airhead to school slut
- Harry undergoes a complete personality change, transforming from 
bumbling adolescent to Don Juan
- Plot?  What plot? (about 70% of the content of FFnet)
- *Badly* done stream of consciousness interspersed with bubble gum 
pop lyrics (Hermione identifies with Christina 
Aguilera's "Reflections" and Harry identifies with Britney 
Spears' "Lucky")
- Sirius' long-lost love child becomes an acquaintance of the Three
- Hermione is actually friends with Lavendar or Parvati
- None of the major plot elements are even *mentioned*... nothing of 
the upcoming war
- Major plot elements are horribly bungled, ending with a *horribly* 
written fight sequence... several of these have had me on the floor 
screaming with laughter
- Hermione commits suicide when Harry or Ron tells her they just want 
to be friends
- Hermione sacrifices her life for Harry, Lily-fashion
- Harry goes to live with Sirius, whose name has been cleared
- Harry (or Harry and Ron) goes to visit Hermione over the summer and 
sparks fly
- Hermione saves Harry from the Dark Side after he has joined forces 
with Voldemort
- Harry and Ron/Gred and Forge/other co-conspirator rescue Hermione 
from marrying someone else or being kidnapped by Voldemort
- HP characters visit fanfic writers at home and clarify their 
positions on recurring fanfic plot lines

That's about all I can remember for now... if I think of any more, 
I'll post them.

Forget "Spaceballs" and "Hot Shots".  HP fanfic... now *that's* 
entertainment.

(BTW, all you fanfic writers, this is just about the only plotline I 
haven't seen yet in anything with even a hint of romance:  no one 
likes Hermione and she is perfectly fine with that.  What an original 
idea!)

Ebony AKA AngieJ