Wizard Paradise (a filk)

[Ebony]

No: HPFGUIDX 8772

--- In HPforGrownups at egroups.com, Rosemary <foxmoth at q...> wrote:
> 
> 		WIZARD PARADISE (to the tune of Gangsta Paradise) a 
filk by Pippin 
> 			*with apologies to Coolio and Weird Al*

Pippin, you nearly made me fall out of my chair!  Two of my favorite 
things--Harry Potter and rap--united.  I couldn't have done it.  I 
would have never thought of it.  My admiration for you has just been 
raised another notch.

Here's my favorite rhymes:

>         I'm a halfblood Parselmouth  Dumbledore defender 
>         Warner Brothers gotta be my merchandise vendor, fool

Perfect combination of hip-hop head braggadacio and Puff Daddy-style 
materialism.

>         I'm 14 now, but will I live to see 18
>         Coz Voldie's out to get me and Snape is really mean.

The ever-present angst of the ghetto youth with that sword of 
Damocles dangling over his head.  Yes!
 
>         Got a werewolf for Defense, got a ghost for History
>         We'll go to any lengths, to solve a mystery

Combining the problems of inner-city life (including poor educational 
structures) with Scooby Doo refs (every rapper I've seen interviewed 
loves cartoons and video games) earns you "mad propz".

>         No phones no fax no VCR
>         No eckeltricity,
>         House elves do all the chores
>         Really ticks Hermione

This verse just plain made me giggle.

Too bad there aren't any wizard rappers... but if there were, a 
strong case could be made for Busta Rhymes (who does spots for the 
sci-fi channel).  There's definitely more to him than meets the eye.

Thanks for the once in a lifetime experience... who knows when I'll 
be able to talk rap and Harry Potter at the same time again?  I *did* 
have a Harry Potter rap/song/poem assignment designed before I had to 
table the unit... too bad.

--Ebony (who's currently hooked on Jay-Z and Mystikal's latest CDs)