[FILK] If We Had A Million Galleons

[Lilac]

No: HPFGUIDX 41986


"If We Had A Million Galleons"

to the tune "If I Had a Million Dollars" by the Bare Naked Ladies (Yes, it's a name of a *real* group, and, no, there are *no* ladies, naked or otherwise, in the group.) 

mp3 link: http://classictunes.50megs.com/mp3.html

Dedicated to any Canadians out there (b/c BNL are from the "Great White North", I believe..."Take off, eh?"...okay, obscure SCTV reference for anyone who gets it...)

(a/n: Okay, this song is very weird, but it is not any more weird than the original. It is also very repetitive. I highly suggest you listen to it to fully appreciate -- or at the very least, understand -- some of the humor of this filk. It was really funny to me at 1 am...)

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: If we had a million galleons,

FRED: We'd make lots of fake wands. GEORGE: Fake wands that squawk and turn into chickens

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: If we had a million galleons,

FRED: We'd make ton-tongue toffies GEORGE: And send a few to dear old Dudley.

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: If we had a million galleons,

FRED: We'd buy Dad a new car. GEORGE: A nice muggle automobile.

FRED: If we had a million galleons BOTH: We'd build our store!

 

FRED: If we had a million galleons GEORGE: We could make-up business cards.

FRED: If we had a million galleons GEORGE: Lee could help -- it wouldn't be that hard.

FRED: If we had a million galleons GEORGE: Maybe we could put a little tiny spell on the cards...

FRED (SPEAKING): Yeah, like it would stick to their fingers and wouldn't come off until they came to the store...

GEORGE (SPEAKING): ...yeah, then we'd take the card off *after* they bought at least 3 things! 

FRED (SP): Hey, some people may not like that! 

GEORGE (SP): Well, can you blame them? FRED(SP): Well... yeah.

 

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: If we had a million galleons,

FRED: We'd buy Ron new dress robes. GEORGE: But not dress robes with lace, that's cruel.

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: If we had a million galleons,

FRED: We'd buy a magical pet.      GEORGE: Yup, like a Phoenix or a Billywig.

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: If we had a million galleons,

FRED:We'd make tons of canary creams. GEORGE: Oooh, all them crazy feathers everywhere!

FRED: If we had a million galleons, BOTH: We'd start our store! 

 

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: We wouldn't have to floo to our store.

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: We'd fly on Firebolts cuz they cost more.

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: We wouldn't have to eat Mom's dinners

FRED (SPEAKING): But we *would* eat Mom's dinners. GEORGE (SPEAKING): Of course we would, we'd just buy her really expensive ingredients. FRED (SP): Yeah, that's right, like all the fanciest wizard ketchups. GEORGE (SP): Mmmm....

 

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: If we had a million galleons,

FRED: We'd eat a ton of chocolate frogs. GEORGE: But not eat real live frogs, that's cruel.

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: If we had a million galleons,

FRED: We'd make our own bombs. GEORGE: Yeah, like dung-, letter- or cherry-. 

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: If we had a million galleons,

FRED: We could buy Dobby the house-elf, GEORGE: Haven't you always wanted a house-elf!

FRED: If we had a million galleons, BOTH: We'd own our store!

 

FRED: If we had a million galleons, GEORGE: If we had a million galleons,

(repeat 2 more times)

BOTH:  We'd be rich!



 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Tut, tut --- hardly any of you remembered that my favorite color is *lilac*. I say so in Year with the Yeti." 

--Gilderoy Lockhart, COS



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