The Big Bangers and Neville

[cindysphynx]

No: HPFGUIDX 35859

Kimberly wrote (for the Neville & Trevor backstory challenge):

<snip Spot-On Canon Indisputable Neville Backstory> 

> ::Kimberly smiles, completely satisfied with her back-story, until 
> she notices the disappointed faces of her audience, and her smile 
> fades::
> 
> What?  What's wrong with that?  Surely being the worse-than-
orphaned 
> child of madpersons who were tortured needlessly by evil dark 
wizards 
> and spending the rest of his childhood trying not to die when his 
> uncle tries to force magic out of him is a pretty good Bang.  

::blinks::

So there's no Memory Charm Neville?  There's no Reverse Memory Charm 
Neville?  We're left with . . . with Daytime Talk Show Neville, who 
has grown up with problems and stress, has perfectly normal personal 
shortcomings, has nagging feelings of inadequacy, and is generally 
bummed out about his lot in life Neville?  Neville, who is worried 
that he will repeat these behavior patterns with his own children.  
Neville, who will have his problems neatly resolved by a mail-order 
PhD-type before the next commercial break.  

Oh, I'm so disappointed! 

::shoulders slump, head hangs, fingers can barely reach keyboard::

This is the polar opposite of both Big Bang and Steady State. It 
needs a cosmology nickname though, something that says "That's All 
There Is", but I can't think of one.  

But then again, Kimberly's theory does rise to the Neville & Trevor 
Challenge, does it not?  I have to hand it to Kimberly, as she 
bravely entered the calm and placid waters with this theory, waters 
others fear to tread.

Can I at least make a special request?  Would Kimberly like to opine 
on the timeline issue (how old was Neville when all of this 
happened)?  Is there any chance we can get a ruling on how the 
Lestranges were caught?  Are you getting any vibe on whether Neville 
was tortured also?  Any thoughts on why he is taken to visit his 
parents, and on whether they are really lost and gone forever?

Kimberly again:

>I examine and pass by theories left and right, 
> and can't seem to pick any that I *really* like.  I guess so far I 
> mostly go with A.N.T.I.T.H.E.S.I.S. (All Nice Theories, I Think. 
> However Each Supposition Is Strained).  So far George and Diana 
are 
> the only theories I can really get excited about, and even then 
I'm 
> divided, since I'd like a *little* bang to go with it.

Hmmm.  Maybe we'll have to sift through the file cabinet that is 
bursting with old theories and find something that suits 
you. ::rustle rustle::   Hmmm.  Are you open to speculation about 
the nature of the protection on Privet Drive?  Are you lying awake 
at night trying to get a handle on Filch and Mrs. Norris?  Or maybe 
you'd be comfortable trying on a few "This Or That Character Is 
Definitely Evil" theories?  Or maybe we can sort out this idea of 
which wand was doing what in the graveyard scene?  There must be 
*something*!  :-)

Cindy (who tried really hard to figure out an Arthur Weasley 
Imperius backstory for Elkins but who failed spectacularly)