[HPforGrownups] FILK: "I Am the Very Model of an Anti-Hero Archetype"

[Amanda]

No: HPFGUIDX 35892

I am truly sorry, I am. But I can't help myself, this is a true work of
genius and must be saluted as such, even though I have absolutely nothing of
substance to add. Bravo, bravo, bravo! This one's getting printed out and
stuck on the wall above my desk. At home *and* at work.

--Amanda

----- Original Message -----
From: "marinafrants" <rusalka at ix.netcom.com>
To: <HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com>
Sent: Thursday, February 28, 2002 2:01 PM
Subject: [HPforGrownups] FILK: "I Am the Very Model of an Anti-Hero
Archetype"


> I Am the Very Model of an Anti-Hero Archetype
> to the tune of "I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General", from
> Pirates of Penzance
> http://math.boisestate.edu/gas/pirates/html/p13.mid
>
> Scene: Enter SNAPE, swirling his cloak, followed by a chorus of
> SLYTHERINS
>
> SNAPE:
> I am the very model of an Anti-Hero Archetype,
> My condescending manner's guaranteed to make the heroes gripe,
> I hang out in a dungeon that a nicer guy would wither in,
> It doesn't bother me at all because I am a Slytherin.
> I always dress in black with a theatrical and stylish flair,
> It makes up for the fact that I don't brush my teeth or wash my hair.
> I work with smelly potions in an underground laboratory
> And have a gift for sarcasm and other snarky oratory.
>
> SLYTHERINS:
> He has a gift for sarcasm and other snarky oratory,
> He has a gift for sarcasm and other snarky oratory,
> He has a gift for sarcasm and other snarky oratory!
>
> SNAPE:
> I'm biased toward Malfoy and the other kids in Slytherin,
> I terrorize Longbottom into quiverin' and ditherin',
> In short I can assure you that I more than live up to the hype
> Of being the very model of an Anti-Hero Archetype.
>
> SLYTHERINS:
> In short we can assure you that he more than lives up to the hype
> Of being the very model of an Anti-Hero Archetype.
>
> SNAPE:
> I have an evil history that's murky and mysterious,
> I have a vicious grudge against that bloody bastard Sirius,
> I torment Harry Potter every opportunity I get,
> But when he is imperiled I am always there to save the brat.
> I was a double-agent in the previous Death Eater war,
> And now I go again to risk my scrawny neck for Dumbledore,
> Exactly what I'm doing, only JKR can say for sure,
> But if I'm caught I'll probably get Crucio'd by Voldemort.
>
> SLYTHERINS:
> But if he's caught he'll probably get Crucio'd by Voldemort,
> But if he's caught he'll probably get Crucio'd by Voldemort,
> But if he's caught he'll probably get Crucio'd by Voldemort.
>
> SNAPE:
> I'm capable of standing up to hazards occupational,
> I'm capable of carrying a grudge cross-generational,
> In short I can assure you that I more than live up to the hype
> Of being the very model of an Anti-Hero Archetype.
>
> SLYTHERINS:
> In short we can assure you that he more than lives up to the hype
> Of being the very model of an Anti-Hero Archetype.
>
> SNAPE:
> In fact, when we discover the true history behind the Prank,
> And learn the real reasons for my quitting the Death Eater ranks,
> And why I knew Dark Magic by the time I first showed up at school,
> And whether I'll make Dumbledore look like a genius or a fool,
> And if Karkaroff mentored me the way he mentors Victor Krum,
> And if I ever really had a crush on Harry Potter's mum,
> In short, when Jo reveals the truth behind my nastiness and rage,
> You'll say a better archetype has never stalked across a page.
>
> SLYTHERINS:
> In short, when Jo reveals the truth behind his nastiness and rage,
> You'll say a better archetype has never stalked across a page.
>
> SNAPE:
> I'm  complicated and intense, heroic and despicable,
> My motives are so twisted, some would say they're inexplicable,
> In short I can assure you that I more than live up to the hype
> Of being the very model of an Anti-Hero Archetype.
>
> SLYTHERINS:
> In short, we can assure you that he more than lives up to the hype
> Of being the very model of an Anti-Hero Archetype!
>
>
> Marina
> rusalka at ix.netcom.com
>
>
>
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