TBAY: HP and the Superfluous Scene

[naamagatus]

No: HPFGUIDX 40346

--- In HPforGrownups at y..., "cindysphynx" <cindysphynx at c...> wrote:
<snip a lot>
> 
> "Ask them this one simple question.  When they re-read GoF, do they 
> ever go back and savor the drama, the tension, the creativity 
> of 'The Portkey' chapter?  No, they do *not*.  Let's face it, 
> sailor."  The Captain leaned toward Dicentra and lowered her 
> voice.  "'The Portkey' is the single *worst* chapter in all of 
> canon.  I mean, there *has* to be a best chapter and a worst 
> chapter, right?  Well, 'The Portkey' is, without question, the 
> *least* entertaining and *most* superfluous chapter in the series – 
> hands down."
> 
<snip another lot>

I love that chapter. Here's a list of the things I liked in it and 
the things that I think are important bits of information:

1. Arthur showing Harry his rather ridiculous Muggle outfit ("a 
golfing jumper and a very old pair of jeans").

2. Explanation of Apparating; grisly but funny description of 
splinching; story of Charlie landing "on top of some poor old dear 
doing her shopping".

3. First mention of Accio, the Summoning Charm.

4. The row between Molly and F&G about the Ton Tongue toffees 
(necessary for the whole drama of her remorse when they return).

5. Arthur explains to Harry the difficulties of organizing the World 
Cup, including the use of Portkeys. 

6. Introducing Amos Diggory and his pride in his only son, Cedric; 
Amos saying "I said to him, I said - Ced, that'll be something to 
tell your grandchildren, that will ... *you beat Harry Potter*!" (I 
just love that!)

7. Showing Cedric's innate modesty and decency ("Cedric looked 
slightly embarrassed...").


All this, however, is not really the point. We can argue whether it's 
necessary to show Accio here, when it's going to be described more 
fully further on. We can argue whether certain lines are entertaining 
or not. The superfluity or otherwise of a chunk of text is a very 
subjective matter. 
For instance. Quidditch itself is, after all, not really relevant to 
the major plot, is it? Should it be scrapped altogether from the 
books? Some people, actually, would say 'yes', because they 
personally find those parts very boring and unentertaining. For them, 
all the large chunks of text that are devoted to Quidditch matches 
are superfluous - neither informative nor entertaining. However, I 
think you would agree that they certainly aren't the product of 
sloppy writing or editing, right? It's a matter of subjective 
enjoyment of this or that part or aspect of the story. 
I personally enjoy chapters like the Portkey precisely because they 
are more descriptive and less dramatic than other chapter. For 
instance, I don't like rereading the dramatic denouement chapters - 
they're too tense for me to enjoy on second rereading. I like the 
leisurely parts, where I can just enjoy being in a different and very 
likable world. I like the chitchat parts and lines like:
"Had to wait for the Accidental Magic Reversal Squad to sort them 
out. Meant a fair old bit of paperwork, I can tell you, what with the 
Muggles who spotted the body parts they'd left behind .."


A rather different aspect of this, is the need for a certain 
thickness of description in a novel (bastardizing Clifford Geertz 
here). It seems to me, Cindy, that if JKR were to follow your project 
of leaving only the parts that are informative and important plot 
wise, we would be left with an abstract of a novel - not the novel 
itself. 
For instance, in order for us to become interested in Harry's special 
destiny, green eyes and scar, we need, in the first place, to care 
about Harry. For that, we need to *know* him (in the sense of get to 
know), get a sense of who he is. Would we feel for an with him if the 
books told us only those thoughts and feelings that he has that are 
crucial to the plot? I doubt it. A description of Harry's anxiety 
before a Quidditch match may not "enhance or establish plot twists or 
significant events" and may not be "entertaining or clever in and of 
themselves", but they *may* add density, thickness, depth, to the 
reader's sense of Harry the person - and that is (IMO) a necessary 
condition for the reader's involvement in the story. 


Naama