TBAY: MATCHINGARMCHAIR & The Ever So Frustrating Egg

[cindysphynx]

No: HPFGUIDX 39149

What on earth is it going to take to get Cindy to *give up already* 
about the darn Egg's wail?

I wish someone would tell me, 'cause I'm starting to *worry* about 
myself here.  But I cannot rest until I get this MATCHINGARMCHAIR to 
Bang properly, darn it!  

OK, it's time for a Come-Back!

****************
Charis Julia wrote:

> Right. I think it's been pretty convincingly argued that the 
>wailing of a golden Triwizard Tournament egg is unlikely to sound 
>much like someone subjected to the Cruciatus Curse. (though I must 
>point out that nobody on this list has ever heard either of them:--
) 

Yes.  Just so that we're all on the same page, GoF describes the Egg 
as follows:

"The most horrible noise, a loud and screechy wailing."  Harry.

"Wailing, screeching sound."  "Incomprehensible."  Harry.

The ghost orchestra playing musical saws.  Harry.

A banshee.  Seamus

"It was someone being tortured!"  Neville.  (Note that Neville does 
not say that it "sounded like" someone being tortured).

"A bit like Percy singing."  George.

"What's this racket?"  Filch.

OK, so hold that thought.

Charis Julia:

> What makes us so sure, Debbie, that Neville at the Gryffindor 
> celebration party is really sitting there thinking "Hang on. 
>Better  be sure of exactly what I'm going to say before I open my 
>mouth.  Right. First thing's first. Now, I hear the Egg right there 
>in front of me. Lets just imagine the sound of my parents being 
>tortured and then compare the results."
> 
> 
> Unlikely.

OK, this bit I like.  Obviously, we're seeing a bit of a knee-jerk 
reaction from Neville.  Almost a panic reaction.  

All right, I'm with you so far, Charis Julia.

Charis Julia:
 
> Sooooo, every loud noise makes his mind leap automatically to the 
> Cruciatus. He can't help it. And especially after that nice little 
> reminder of his parents torment courtesy of Monsieur Crouch which 
> made all those old memories resurface with a vengeance.

Ah, but *why*?  *Why* does Neville liken the Egg's wail to torture?  
Is he thinking of his parents' tortured screams, the ones he hears 
because of the Memory Potion?  Is he hearing the tortured sound of 
Snape slowly twisting the life from Neville's beloved and helpless 
blue bird?  

Well, maybe.  But there are two other possibilities to explain 
Neville's reaction.  

The first option is that Neville reacts the way he does because of 
those dreaded visits to his parents at St. Mungos.  What do his 
parents likely *do* during those visits?  Well, that depends on 
whether you want a Bang or not.

If you want a Bang (as I surely do), then they *wail*, that's what 
they do!  They are insane, Dumbledore tells us.  They do not 
recognize Neville.  Fair enough.

But what is the most Bangy scenario we can think of to explain what 
the Longbottoms might actually *do* during those visits?  Having 
them lie quietly in their beds, staring at the ceiling, being rolled 
over every hour on the hour, is a total Dud.  

No, they need to *wail*, just like the Egg.  Loudly.  They sit up, 
clutching their knees, rocking back and forth, wailing loudly pretty 
much non-stop.  Heck, if you really want a Huge Bang, we can decide 
that the closer Neville comes, the more loudly they wail.

So (boy, I hope I can add this up properly), Neville hears the Egg's 
wail and doesn't liken it to the night of the torture, as he recalls 
that his parents sounded nothing like the Egg when Mrs. Lestrange 
was working them over.  Neville doesn't think it sounds like the 
Jobberknoll.  No, Neville is reminded of the torture because his 
parents wail just like the Egg during his most recent visit with 
them.

<nods in satisfaction>

Now, there's a second option for those still unconvinced.  

<glances nervously at Elkins>

It could simply be that the character of the Egg's wail changes for 
each person hearing it.  The noise is is what it is, but each person 
hears something deeply and subjectively unpleasant.  For Harry, it 
is the ghost orchestra.  For Seamus, it is the banshee.  For George, 
it is annoying Percy.  For Filch, it is a "racket" -- the kind of 
irritating noise mischievous students make.  For me, it would be the 
voice of Gilderoy Lockhart.  And for Neville . . . well, for 
Neville, it is those horrid visits to his wailing parents.  

Heck, if we decide the Egg's wail is subjective, then we can really 
destroy the Egg argument.  Neville really *might* be hearing his 
parents tortured cries again, even though it doesn't sound like that 
to anyone else.  And what freaks him out is not the sound -- he has 
heard that a million times.  It is the fact that the sound isn't 
inside his own head this time -- and that *is* something new, 
different and frightening.  Good reason to drop a plate of sausages, 
I'd say.

And what, BTW, is the canon for the idea that the Egg's wail might 
affect each listener differently?  Gee, is there anything we've seen 
so far that objects each person differently?  Ah, but of course!  
Dementors and boggarts!  The effect of a dementor and a boggart are 
both highly subjective and individualized.  Oh, yeah.  There's 
plenty of precedent to believe that Neville really did hear in the 
Egg his parents' torture after all.

So, Eileen and Charis Julia, we can have our MATCHINGARMCHAIR with 
Jobberknoll plus Wailing Insane Parents Variant.  Or we can go with 
MATCHINGARMCHAIR with Jobberknoll plus Subjective Egg Variant with 
optional Wailing Insane Parents.  Your choice.

And Debbie, we'd *love* to have you on board, so will you convert?  

We've rather thrown in the towel on converting Elkins.  ;-)  

Cindy (saluting Eileen and Charis Julia for the unwavering loyalty 
when Cindy was so clearly beaten)