TBAY: Canon College: DEs and Aurors 101 (WAS "Despiadado"

[lucky_kari]

No: HPFGUIDX 43426

Sitting in the faculty lounge of the Canon College, Professor Eileen 
Lucky-Kari looks about for a colleague to gripe to about her students. 
 Luckily, Professor George, who teaches logic to a most unresponsive 
bunch of Potter theorizers, and is internationally known as the 
founder of a school of philosophy known as 
S.W.E.E.T.G.E.O.R.G.I.A.N.I.S.M., is at hand, shaking his handsome 
head over a truckload of final essays for Severus Snape 101.

"Severus Snape obviously went to a party one night, drank too much, 
and woke up with the Dark Mark. He never actually liked any of the 
other Death Eaters," George reads from the essay, his brow 
attractively furrowed in disapproval. "And she's circled "Instructor: 
Professor George," with little hearts."

"Well, I get that a lot with Avery, but I suspect he thinks I'll up 
his marks for the hearts," says Professor Eileen. "No, my problem is 
Cindy. She's a brilliant student, all right, probably one of the most 
brilliant the  Canon College has ever seen, but I think she's using 
the Imperius curse on me. And she has been stealing theories from 
undergraduates and claiming them for herself. Piracy, I think she 
calls it."

"Call in the Ministery of Magic Moderators then," says George, failing 
the infatuated essay writer, and reaching for another paper.

"That's much too reasonable. Can't you think of something more 
satisfying? Something involving werewolves, and ton-tongue toffees, 
and canary creams?"

"I'm George," says the professor with admirable restraint. "Principal 
over passion, remember? And you really have to learn to control your 
emotions. You've been crying in class, haven't you?"

"It's all Cindy's fault," Eileen says, breaking down again. George 
quietly pats her back.

"She said... things about Crouch Sr. that..." Eileen is weeping.

"What did she say?"

She said,
>At
> first glance, this does look like a situation where a wizard is 
> actually apologizing, doesn't it?  That would be almost 
> unprecedented in canon, wouldn't it?  It would make Crouch Sr. 
> pretty darn special indeed.
> 
> "But let's not forget something here.  Crouch Sr. was *delirious* in 
> that scene!  He was raving mad and chewing the rug!  He didn't know 
> what he was saying!  So if he was out of his mind, can we really be 
> sure that this was a true, heartfelt redemption?  Besides, this 
> might have been a case where Crouch Sr. was just looking for a way 
> to save his own hide.

Eileen weeps. "And then she started making very insinuating remarks 
about my personal life, in front of the entire class,
> "But if you want to pine for Crouch Sr., we could try a "Comfort-
> Hurt" theory – a feeling that you had better comfort Crouch Sr. 
> before he *hurts* you.  After all, power is the ultimate 
> aphrodisiac.  And, uh, don't take this the wrong way or anything, 
> Professor, but we all know how much you like to be *hurt*."

George smiles wanly. "You know, I'm only a Snape theory, so I'm not 
well qualified to comment, but doesn't canon already have that angle 
covered?"

"Does it?" asks Eileen distractedly. "About Comfort Hurt and power 
being the ultimate aphrodisiac?"

"No, about Crouch being delirius. Check it out," George hands Eileen 
his copy of GoF, extensively annotated in a neat hand.

Eileen reads,

----------------------------

Then Ron said in a falsely confident voice, "But he was out of his 
mind, like you said, so half of it was probably just raving..."

"He was sanest when he was trying to talk about Voldemort," said 
Harry, ignoring Ron's wince. "He was having real trouble stringing two 
words together, but that was when he seemed to know where he was, and 
know what he wanted to do. He just kept saying he had to see 
Dumbledore." 

----------------------------

A smile lights up on Eileen's face. 

"So there you are," said George. "Harry's word against Cindy's. Which 
do you want to trust?"

"But Cindy also said that Crouch could be just trying to save his 
hide."

"And Snape could have just being trying to save his hide as well," 
said George with a smile. "Some people," he looks down at the paper he 
is reading and reluctantly gives it an A, "believe such things, and we 
have to tolerate their opinions. Still, I'm surprised that Cindy would 
believe in such a cynical and uninspiring reading of canon. What sort 
of pathos does she believe a movie-scene of self-interested maneuvring 
holds in comparison to a movie-scene of heart felt remorse and a birth 
of self-knowledge?"

Professor Faith who has come in during the conversation and been 
closely listening adds, "And, there's a little thing called Occam's 
Razor. If Crouch seems heart-broken, full of guilt and remorse, 
wouldn't it be best to take JKR's portrayal on its surface, unless we 
have any reason to think there's something fishy about it?"

George nods appreciatively at Faith who has co-taught several courses 
with him in the past. "So, are you feeling better," he asks Eileen, 
"or would you like to 
go for therapy at St. Mungo's. I could help you deal with your 
problems, you know."

Eileen, remembering the last group therapy session with 
Elkins, Cindy, Avery, and Dr. George, declines the offer. 

"George, could I have your opinion on one of Cindy's arguments?"

George pauses. "You're not actually asking me to give an opinion on 
another subject than Snape, are you? Because you know what happens 
when I do that. Elkins comes charging in here and accuses me of being 
a slut, flirting with every theory I meet." Eileen can't be entirely 
sure, but she almost thinks George has just fluttered his eyelashes.

"Talk this one out with me, at least. I'm not too good at dramatic 
monologues. Here's what Cindy said."

>Things get murky when we get to the subject of fleeing 
>suspects. See, cops aren't normally allowed to shoot a 
>suspect in the back when the suspect is trying to run 
>away. Not normally. But they *can* shoot suspects in 
>the back in one situation that might be 
>pertinent here – when the suspect poses a danger if 
>allowed to escape. I think there are limitations on 
>this, of course. Like cops can only do this for 
>suspects who commit a serious crime in the 
>presence of the cop, maybe. I think there are other 
>limitations, like there has to be an attempt to 
>apprehend and a warning or something. That's basically 
>how I think it works in the muggle world. In the U.S. 
>About 15 years ago when I last read that law 
>textbook. Unless something has changed, anyway.

"That sounds reasonable," says George. "I'm no expert in law, though, 
but I do feel that the suspect might not have to commit the crime in 
the presence of a cop. A man who is wandering about on a shooting 
spree would qualify. However, Cindy is basically right that police 
have the authority to kill in situations where they are not 
immediately defending themselves or bystanders. I think that's an 
extension of defense of self or others. What else did she say?"

>"Now, it is entirely possible that, before Crouch 
>authorized the use of the Unforgiveables, the 
>wizarding rules didn't allow aurors to shoot suspects 
>in the back at all. Aurors *had* to try to hit them 
>with some spell and capture them if they were trying 
>to flee. 

"Now, this is where I'm skeptical," interrupts Eileen. "You see, 
that's so contrary to common sense. You'd have to be a bleeding heart 
of the bloodiest variety to ban all lethal force in the case of the 
Fleeing Suspect. Crouch relaxing the safeguards, I can see. But not 
his having to do away with a law that NEVER EVER allowed the auror to 
shoot the Fleeing Suspect in the back. Who would make that law? All 
those tough wizards we like to talk about?"

George smiles. "Why do we have those safeguards, btw?" he asks in true 
Socratic fashion.

"Because, if we don't, a cop can say "He was running, therefore I had 
to shoot him." It already happens often enough," says Eileen. 

"Exactly," says George. "Anyway, what was Cindy reacting to?"

"Oh, Elkins said,
>I think Crouch Sr. authorized Aurors to kill anyone 
>they damn well felt like, with little or no 
>accountability to anyone for their actions.

"Of course," continues Eileen. "I don't think Elkins meant that Frank 
Longbottom was Avada Kedavring his neighbours for their tennis table 
while Crouch Sr. looked the other way. That's Dekulakization not the 
Potterverse."

"Deku-what?" says Faith, her eyes popping out of her head. 

"Dekulakization and Collectivization from 1921-1929 in Soviet Russia. 
That was the title of a paper of mine that got a perfect mark. 
Naturally, I remember it quite well. Anyway, the Soviet government was 
sending people off to the Gulag for being "kulaks" i.e. rich peasants 
who exploited the proletariat. Only problem was that the "kulaks" 
weren't anything of the sort. It was a weapon of terror. Anyway, 
people were outing other people as "kulaks" for their tennis tables. 
Well, not for tennis tables, maybe, but you know what I mean."

"I've read Solzhenitsyn," said George nodding.

"Solzhenitsyn," said Eileen "is one of my favourite authors, and the 
Gulag Archipelago is one of my favourite books. Have you ever read the 
section on torture? You see in the civilized Soviet Union, torture was 
legal for most of the Stalinist and even pre-Stalinist area. You were 
supposed to apply to use it. And consent was easy to get. Still, the 
so-called investigators much preferred not to, to hide the fact that 
they were using torture. They preferred methods of torture that left 
no marks. And they were very good at it. Solzhenitsyn lists about two 
dozen preferred methods, IIRC. So when I heard that Crouch was 
tolerating Cruciatus, a form of advanced torture that left no marks, I 
went all Solzhenitsyn."

"Very interesting," says George. "But the Case of the Fleeing Wizard?"

"Wait a minute, George. I said that I really didn't see Dekulakization 
as a realistic role-model for the Potterverse, but I do know what the 
Pensieve scenes reminded me of. Paris after the German occupation. 
Malcolm Muggeridge, an eye-witness, puts it best.

"It was, all things considered, one of the more squalid episodes in 
France's history, with, as it sometimes seemed, everyone informing on 
everyone else. The prefectures and the police stations were stuffed 
with accusatory letters; some even foun their way to the Boulevard 
Suchet. A whole people's sense of guilt found expression in this 
unedifying passion to accuse and to punish others, which, of course, 
also opened the way to a great deal of working off of private grudges 
and envies."

Eileen pauses. "Back to the Case of the Fleeing Wizard. It's very easy 
to say that the suspect was fleeing and that's why you shot him in the 
back. Cindy, however, says
>If the wizarding world adopted the appropriate 
>safeguards and procedures, it is entirely possible 
>that they adopted a system that was a reasonable 
>balance of the interests of the state and the 
>suspect in the Case Of The Fleeing Wizard. 

"And that's why Sirius was complaining?" asks George.

>"After all, we don't know that there would be no 
>accountability if an Auror didn't follow established 
>procedure and killed on sight or something. As Elkins 
>said, the wizarding world does have a justice 
>system, and there's no reason to think Aurors had 
>immunity for criminal action if they abused their 
>authority according to whatever procedural 
>requirements were established

"Well, they were accountable. To Bartemius Crouch Sr," says Eileen. "I 
doubt he'd countenance Aurors offing their neighbours for tennis 
tables, but Sirius claims in canon that he countenanced certain abuses 
of authority, including perhaps claiming "A Case of the Fleeing 
Suspect" when that was not the case."

"Why did you mention Frank Longbottom?" asks George suspiciously. 
"You're not trying to involve Longbottom in this, are you?"

"Of course I am," says Eileen. "What good's a theory without Frank 
Longbottom in it?"

"Cindy didn't like it, I'm guessing?"

"You guess right, George. She said
>There are lots of ways aurors could become 
>popular. Maybe Frank demonstrated bravery and saved
 >someone's life. Maybe he was restrained like Moody. 
>Maybe he was just charismatic or dealt with the press 
>a lot. But if Dumbledore liked Frank, that suggests 
>that Frank wasn't all bad.

"That last's not a bad point," opines George.

"Of course, it's a good point. I've made it and so has Elkins. And 
Cindy just has to rub it in our faces," Eileen looks decidedly weepy 
once again.

"Dumbledore likes Snape," says George earnestly. "You can still have 
Frank involved in some ill-advised abuse of justice and Dumbledore 
approving generally of Frank. Sirius and Lupin were about to off 
Pettigrew in the Shrieking Shack and Dumbledore still generally 
approves of them. All we know is that Frank wasn't all bad, not that 
Frank under extreme pressure, you must admit, always did the right 
thing." 

"George, that is brilliant!" says Eileen. "Just wait till I tell Cindy 
that. And... errr..." Eileen begins to blush. "George, I was 
wondering... Are you and Captain Tabouli still an item?"

George smiles mysteriously. "Do you want to go out to dinner?" he 
asks, looking more handsome than ever. "I'll pick you up at six 
o'clock."

At six o'clock, Elkins, Avery, and Cindy, sprawled out on the grass 
outside the Students' Union Building, watch as Professor Eileen runs 
out to Professor George's red sportscar, which speeds out of the 
parking lot at break-neck speeds.

"Cindy, I've said it before, and I'll say it again," says Elkins. 
"That Snape theory is a slut!"

"You're just jealous," says Cindy.

---------------------------
                
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