FILK: That Girl Hermione

[stickbook41]

No: HPFGUIDX 55928

THAT GIRL HERMIONE
A filk to the tune of "Breakfast At Tiffany's" by Deep Blue 
Something, on their album Home

SCENE:
SS/PS—It's 31 October, the first-year Gryffindors are sitting in 
Charms class

RON:
Flitwick did not partner me with Harry
He stuck me with Hermione
That bossy know-it-all
I said the spell and waved my wand `round
Our feather stayed on the ground
She said, "You did it all wrong!"

So I said, "Well then,
You do it, Smarty-pants!"
And that girl said, "You
Have to pronunciate!"
If I recall, she made
The feather go straight up
Then she said, "That's how
You levitate!"

I stomped out—I said she was a nightmare
I was too angry to care
That I made her cry
I won't mind if she never recovers
And I'm glad we got rid of her
I can get on with my life

Then Harry said, "What about
That girl Hermione?"
He said, "I think that
Maybe she heard you."
As I recall, I think,
I felt kinda funny
But I said, "That means
She now has a clue."

(Fast forward to the Halloween feast)

RON:
I said, "What a great Hallowe'en feast!
So many pasties and sweets
Sugary and sour!"
Quirrell yelled, "A troll is in the basement!"
The look upon his face meant
We'd go back to the tower

Then Harry said, "What about
That girl Hermione?"
I said, "Okay, but
We better not get caught!"
"And if I recall," he said,
"Then she's in the bathroom.
She doesn't know, so we're
The one chance she's got!"

We entered the bathroom
And there was Hermione
Panicking under
One of the sinks
And if I recall, Harry said,
"Try to distract it!"
And jumped on the troll without
Stopping to think

So I yelled, "Hang on!
I'll save you, Hermione!"
Recalling what she said,
"You have to pronunciate!"
If I recall, I made
The troll's club go straight up
Then I said, "That's how
You levitate!"

(And the rest, as they say, is history.)


Cheers!

-stickbook