Figg Girl Can’t Fly (filk)

[Caius Marcius]

No: HPFGUIDX 78075

Figg Girl Can't Fly (OOP, Chap. 2)

To the tune of Big Girls Don't Cry by The Four Seasons

Hear the original at 

http://www.buffnet.net/~ambrosia/home.htm

Dedicated to CW, who wrote in #77430

"Personally, I am quite prepared to wade 
through, tolerate/ignore the various mistakes, repeated questions, 
utterly boring FILKS and interminable SHIP discussions, in the 
interests of turning up some novel idea from a fresh mind."

That's exactly the kind of tolerance and acceptance that brings the 
Potterfanverse together! (although "filks" needn't be capitalized: 
don't feel compelled by our collective charisma!)

THE SCENE: Wisteria Walk. Immediately after the dementor attack, 
HARRY is accosted by ARABELLA FIGG, who makes a surprising declaration

HARRY (spoken): You're – you're a witch?
FIGG (spoken):  I'm a  Squib, as Mundungus knows full well
..

FIGG: (music)
Figg girl can't fly
Figg girl can't fly

HARRY & (FIGG)
Fi-igg girl, you came by-yi-yi (I came by)
Fi-igg girl, tell me why-yi-yi (I am your ally)
Figg girl (where's that Dungus guy?) Dungus guy?
(I will that man fry) That man will die!

(MUNDUNGUS FLETCHER Apparates onto the scene)

(FIGG) & MUNDUNGUS 
(Dungy boy) I stood guard but had to sneak off
(Dungy boy) Cauldrons 90% off
(Dungy boy) Now she swings, and gives this cry:

FIGG & MUNDUNGUS
"Figg girl fists fly"

FIGG & (MUNDUNGUS)
Fi-igg girl fists fly-yi-yi (please don't fly)
Fi-igg girl fists fly-yi-yi (she will crucify)
Perhaps (I was du-uh-umb) you were dumb
Dumb sap (I'll tell Dumb) yes, go tell Dumb

FIGG & (MUNDUNGUS)
(Figgy girl) Shame on you, Dementors came
(Figgy girl) Poor Harry they'll blame
(Figgy girl) Dumbledore's not satisfied

FIGG, MUNDUNGUS & HARRY
Be horrified!

MUNDUNGUS & HARRY & (FIGG)
Fi-igg girl she's awry-yi-yi (I'm awry)
Fi-igg girl's still spry (I am not mollified)
Figg girl's still spry
Figg girl's still spry
Figg girl's still spry
Figg girl's still spry......

(MUNDUNGUS Apparates to Dumbledore while FIGG leads HARRY back to 
Privet Drive with Dudley in tow)

    -	CMC (Yes, I'm still working on A!Kedavra)

HARRY POTTER FILKS 
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm