(FILK) Perfectly Normal Muggles (WAS: FILK idea)

[Gail Bohacek]

No: HPFGUIDX 49692








Anne U. Wrote:

>I've seen many filks on this list so perhaps this is the right place
>to post an idea for a filk. >SNIP< We don't
>know much about Hermione's parents, but we do know that they seem to
>have accepted and perhaps even embraced the fact that she's a witch.
>SNIP A BIT MORE< You might even called them modern ...
>thoroughly modern... especially for Muggles... perhaps even
>Thoroughly Modern Muggles??:-)


Well...I've been tweaking at the lyrics here.  I've come up with a Muggle 
filk, however it's not about Hermione's parents.  We have much more dirt on 
the Dursleys :)>

I hope you dig it.




Perfectly Normal Muggles

(A FILK by Gail Bohacek to the tune of _Thoroughly Modern Millie_ from the 
musical of the same name)


SS chapter 4


"Haven't I told you he's not going?" Uncle Vernon hissed.  "He's going to 
Stonewall High and he'll be happy for it.  I've read those letters and he 
needs all sorts of rubbish.  Spell books and wands and..."

"If he wants ter go, a great Muggle like you won't stop him, " growled 
Hagrid.


Uncle Vernon (Intro)

We will not
Have him taught
Spells by some
Old crackpot
This magic rubbish
Spell books and magic wands
What we think about it is that it's horrible
We think it's odd, different and deplorable
the plain fact is...

Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia Together:

Everyone knows we are perfectly normal
Thank you very very much
Everyone knows we won't tolerate
This is the reality
Not that...insanity
It's nothing but tosh
In fact...it's nonsense
To wave a wand and cast some spell
In our average life, our world is so ordered
But that boy is impossible
Any sort of magic we won't allow
Here it's not permissible
Goodbye Wizarding World
We've taken a vow
We'll stamp it out
'Coz we're perfectly normal
Muggles now

Everyone knows we are perfectly normal
Wizards are so peculiar
We both will not permit Harry to go
Not to that fool school of yours
We say it's abnormal
What you all do
You're forgetting that
We won't pay for his school
Have you seen the way they dress in those long robes?
Isn't it deplorable?
We'll beat it out of that boy somehow
Goodbye Wizarding World
We've taken a vow
We'll stamp it out
'Coz we're perfectly normal
Muggles now!


-Gail B.



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