FILK: "The Egg"

[Haggridd <jkusalavagemd@yahoo.com>]

No: HPFGUIDX 51238

This is a filk of the song "The Egg" from the musical "1776".   In 
the musical the egg hatched an American Bald Eagle.  Here in the 
Wizarding World, things are a bit different.

-Haggridd (with apologies to John Adams, Benjamin Franklin and Thomas 
Jefferson)


                         The Egg


Scene:  Hagrid's Hut.  Hagrid has reluctantly admitted the Trio to 
his hut, which has all the windows shut tight, and there is a roaring 
fire in the fireplace.  It is boiling hot.  The Trio is criticizing 
Hagrid about his new acquisition, a heavy black ovoid object.

Hagrid:          It was at the old Hog's Head
                 Ev'ry hand I laid down was a winner.
                
Ron:             You should have stayed in bed
                 Or just baked your rock cakes for diner.

Harry:           You should have known 'twas no black stone
                 You carried home in your wagon.

Hermione:        You had to see in the library
                 It was the egg of a dragon.

Hagrid:          Two wizards, a giant, and a witch--
                 Smart, brave and always game
                 For any kind of fun--

Hermione:        But this job we shall shun
                 Giving dragons a good name.

Ron:             Name?  What name?

Hagrid:          'E's Norbert!  And I'm his mummy!

The Trio:        We're waiting for the screech, screech, screech
                 Of a dragon being born.

Hermione:        Waiting for your hut to burn
                 'Cause this stifling hut is made of wood and
                 Right by the Forbidden Forest.
                 You have the fireplace quite hot enough
                 To hatch that stone--

Hagrid:          Herm... but that's the egg!

The Trio:        You know that it's against our laws
                 For that horrifying monster
                 Made of scales, teeth and claws
                 Any longer to remain at Hogwarts
                 Right by the Forbidden Forrest.

Ron:             Besides, you'll run out of chicken blood
                 To feed that beast
                 And brandy isn't cheap.

The Trio:        The dragon's going to have to go
                 From the grounds of Hogwarts now.
                 The Ministry will just say no
                 To your plan to raise a great huge dragon
                 No matter how "interesting".

Ron:             No matter how strong your mania
                 There's a dragon preserve in Romania
                 Where Charlie will give him a good home.

The Trio:        No matter how strong your mania
                 He has to go to Romania
                 Where Charlie will give him a good home!