TBAY: Re: Curiouser and Curiouser

[Susan Atherton]

No: HPFGUIDX 71953

With the storm finally over in Theory Bay, the residents were starting to pick up the pieces of their disrupted lives. Kirstini's Souvenir Shack stood proudly outside the Canon Museum as Dicentra and Stoned!Harry rifled through the contents trying to find him a new leg. Eileen and Elkins were down by the water's edge arguing as FourthMan!Avery lay on the ground beside them, not moving.

A brunette was sitting on the train staring out of the window at all this in wonder. It was her first visit to the Bay, although she'd been reading about the happenings there with the other listies for a while. 

Susan brushed back her hair and adjusted her robes uncomfortably. They were brand new for her TBAY debut, and they itched. After a few more minutes of wriggling around and some very strange looks from the other passengers in her compartment, she decided that a little walk might take her mind off things - at the very least, she might be able to find somewhere else to sit where they didn't look at her as if she'd gone mad.

Wandering along the train, she started to follow a trail of Kingsley Shacklebolt thongs right into a compartment stuffed to the gills with listies and theories. Struggling her way to the end to open a window (some of those Kingsley thongs were starting to reek a little bit), she couldn't help but overhear the conversation going on next to her.

Kirstini and Bonnie were deep in a conversation about the ongoing discussion of homosexual characters within the series. Susan shook her head, bored already - she couldn't care less if Sirius was gay, he would always be dead sexy to her - no pun intended. But then the conversation took an interesting turn for the better.

Bonnie had handed Kirstini a pamphlet and she was now reading it aloud.

"In PS/SS, the reader gets to meet Vernon and Dudley Dursley, who are Harry's uncle and cousin, respectively. Now, both Harry's aunt and uncle spoil Dudley mercilessly, but it is important to note that his father never babies Dudley the way that his mother does. In fact, he fits into the stereotypical mode of the macho father who emphasizes his son maintaining his masculinity above everything else, sort of like the father who is always on the sidelines at his son's sports game, yelling at the coach for not putting his son in such and such a position, yelling at other parents for their son being bad at the game, and yelling at his son for not being tough enough. I wouldn't be surprised to find in either book six or seven that Dudley turns out to be gay, since the son killing the father either literally or symbolically has been such a major theme. So Dudley coming out to his father would definitely kill his father on one level because of the type of nasty father that he is. I doubt that Dudley's worst fear when being attacked by the Dementor was not being turned into a pig or the tongue-toffee incident but having his parents, especially his father, find out he is gay. Also, there are certainly a few signs that Dudley could be gay. His mother babies him; his father wants him to be manly; he bullies weaker males probably because he's attracted to them when he doesn't want to be or because he feels that if he beats them up he'll beat his own "weakness" out of his system; he projects himself onto Harry when he says that Harry was calling out his boyfriend's name. Yes, I think that Dudley might just be gay, and Uncle Vernon is going to go through the roof when he finds out, probably either blaming Harry for his son being gay, or going into complete denial altogether."

Kirstini looked up from the pamphlet. Bonnie the Ant-Bee was watching her, with a worried look on her face.

"That's brilliant!" said Kirstini. She opened her mouth to continue, but a little cough interrupted her.

"Hem, hem."

Kirstini and Bonnie turned to see Susan smiling at them. "I'm so sorry to interrupt, I just couldn't resist. That's a brilliant theory, Bonnie, and fits in really well with canon. Even Dudley's nickname, Big D, and his pride in it (and his anger when Harry mocks it) fit in with his overinflated opinion of himself, and *not* in an arrogant way - although," she grinned. "I do think Dudley is pretty arrogant, don't get me wrong."

"No, it fits in more with the appearance Dudley feels he should represent to the world - he wants to be ubermasculine, because that's what his father requires from him. The nickname is a badge of respect from his peers - his all-male peers. Dudley is 15 too, and must be interested in girls like Harry, but he never shows it, instead bragging about his boxing rather than his sexual prowess (and a guy like Dudley would, methinks. Brag, that is, not get some)."

"And he certainly looked shaken by whatever he'd heard from the Dementors - he fell over, requiring Harry to protect and save him. How that must have galled him! Harry, his detested cousin, becoming his strong knight in shining armour, just as he must wish the faceless manifestion of his dream guy would. And of course, the whole boxing title thing - he wants to be the world's manliest man. Bless him."

"With that in mind, I have devised a little acronym for you, if you want it (it's my very first one, and is therefore likely to be pathetic, so you can scrap it if you want):

"HIT RIDDLE. Hidden Internal Tendencies; Reveals Iccle Duddy's Desperate Lustful Emotions."

Susan smiled at them both hopefully, then pointed at the space at the top of the pamphlet. "It'd look nice there," she said brightly.




Susan
who is so happy to finally have something to add to a TBAY discussion!
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"Help me Jebus!" --Homer Simpson
"Shame on you! Ugly baby judges you!" --Ross Geller
"Oh yeah, and did I mention I've got a baby?" --Stuart Alan Jones
"You know, I telephoned my grandparents the other day, and my grandfather said to me, 'We saw your movie.' 'Which one?' I said, and he shouted, 'Betty, what was the name of that movie I didn't like?'" --Brad Pitt


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