TBAY : OOP: among the wreckage

[K]

No: HPFGUIDX 64880


K slowly picks her way through the wreckage littering the shores of the 
bay. Although the hurricane has passed, the sky is strangely dark. A few 
lonely figures are scattered here and there along the shore, including a 
woman tenderly tending to a one-legged boy. In the distance the new wing 
of the Canon Museum looms over the bay, an imposing structure hung with 
what must be acres of "Grand Opening" banners.

K heads toward a little cove tucked away under the sea cliffs, invisible 
to the crowds gathered on the observation platforms far above. She 
shakes off some stringy material clinging to her shoe - not seaweed, 
just another tangle of Rookwood thongs washed up on the shore. Shaking 
her head in disbelief - who ever bought those things in the first place, 
anyway? - she enters the cove and sighs. Empty. But what did she expect? 
Peering into the water she sees the remains of her half-built theory. 
Not that it had pretensions, just a little raft built with some spare 
pieces gleaned from the shipyards. A plank from SEVENTH SON here, from 
REDHEAD ALWAYS there; a couple of criss-crossed wands wedged into the 
ropes, a little brass dragon glued to one end.... All sunk. Sunk.

Sitting down, she muses over her theory that was never launched: 
Dumbledore as the hypothesized missing Weasly child. Why not? As so many 
theorists have pointed out before, he's got the red hair, the tall 
build, the nose, the sense of humor - sure that sounds like Ron, but 
other Weasleys meet that description too. Bill. Percy. OK, Percy with a 
sense of humor (there are some pretty wild speculations out here on the 
bay, aren't there?). Perhaps, just perhaps, that  (hypothetical) missing 
Weasley child? The one whose name should start with *D*???

K looks around her nervously. Grey Wolf should busy back at the safe 
house, where the MDDT were busy adjusting antennae on the roof, 
refueling the generators for the UPS*, restocking the pop tart pantry. 
Metathinking in any form is probably as safe now as it will ever be.

OK, so there were some minor hits to the alphabetized Weasly naming 
scheme.  Percy's full name does not start with "Edward" after all  But 
Ginny's name is still unresolved, and Iphigenia is still a possibility. 
On the other hand, Dumbledore's full name includes Percival - another 
Weasley connection. So: Bill, Charlie, ?Dumbledore?, Percy, Fred, 
George, Ron, Iphigenia/Ginny. B, C, D, P, F, G, R, I. So close, so close.

K continues to muse: The alphabetical naming scheme was not necessarily 
something that Molly and Arthur came up with. Maybe it was just JKR 
making a list and filling in names. She does like charts and lists. Ron 
might have started out as Howard or Hector or... Harry? Molly does speak 
of him as her son...  Anyway, there is certainly precedence for JKR 
changing names along the way.

But this raft is sunk. Never mind how implausible it is that a young 
child would go back in time to become Dumbledore. Where's the bang in 
that anyway? What would a baby, or even a ten year old, know that would 
give Dumbledore the "edge"? But no, this raft was not sunk solely 
because of its shoddy construction. Not because of its weak materials, 
its wormy wood. And no, other theorists had not come to confiscate those 
bits and pieces of their vessels that had, um, fallen off a broomstick.

No, this raft was sunk deliberately.

And the vandal has left a calling card.

K snatches a scrap of paper she spies pinned underneath a small rock set 
upon a larger stone. A wizarding photograph, with a large group of 
wizards and witches milling about, some smiling and waving. What's this? 
It is labeled "Order of the Phoenix, the Old Crowd". Turning it over, 
she reads: "Aberforth was here."

Frowning, she crumples the photograph and throws it down. Aberforth. He 
was supposed to be just a *joke*. A funny *aside*, to throw us off 
track. He was *not* supposed to come waltzing into Theory Bay, wrecking 
peoples perfectly sound, um, marginally seaworthy, um, half constructed 
and most likely unfloatable, theories!  He shows up once, does nothing, 
*nothing*, except an act of gratuitous vandalism on a perfectly harmless 
little theory! Well, at least he won't be back!

Wait a minute, K thinks, just hold on. Why *does* he make this utterly 
useless appearance? Is it another cannon for the GARBAGE SCOW? A bit of 
make-work for Lexicon Steve? What's the point? Why is JKR bringing 
Dumbledore's family into this, anyway? Something's up here. Yes, 
something is up. She picks up the photograph and gently smoothes it out. 
Folding it carefully, she puts it back into her pocket. Might come in 
handy one of these days - you never know.

The skies are still dark. Looking up, K realizes that lowering clouds 
are actually flocks of thousands of owls. Thousands, each carrying a bit 
of parchment labeled "OOP:" Even with Omniculars, the visibility up 
there on the observation platforms must be very poor. Might be a good 
idea to stay down here in the Bay a while longer.

K heads back to the more populated part of the shore. Perhaps she will 
stop in at the Royal George - but no, it will probably be full of the 
old crowd, and you never know who you may run into there. Maybe even 
someone who has noticed that a bit of their theory has gone missing. 
Instead she makes her way over to join a couple of hobbit-like folk 
sitting on a fence. There's a mighty fine view of the ships from there, 
and though she has no interest in joining a crew, she just might find it 
entertaining to watch them bale.

She smiles to herself. She may have lost her raft, but she still is 
pretty sure she knows when Petunia's birthday is.

K, who hope the TBAY old crowd will forgive her lack of attributions.

*UPS = Uninterruptible Power Supply