Molly-the coddler (was: Chapter Discussions: Chapter 4)

[a_reader2003]

No: HPFGUIDX 83989

--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, "jwcpgh" <jwcpgh at y...> wrote:
(huge snip)
> Laura:
> > <snip>  It's not like Harry went to Molly for advice at any point 
> throughout the 5 books.
>  
> > Pippin:
> > And that had to hurt. 
> 
> Laura replies:
> 
> No one *ever* goes to Molly for advice.  In the kitchen scene at 
GP, 
> everyone in the room, including her own husband, disagrees with 
> her.  That should tell us something.
> (snip)
 My reaction to that was to gasp-what an incredibly cruel and hurtful 
> thing to say!  She accuses Sirius of confusing Harry with James.  
> Yet she confuses 15-year-old!Harry with a much younger Harry she 
> never even knew.  She doesn't do any of the kids a service by 
> refusing to let them grow up just because the big world can be 
> scary.  Guess what-it'll be that way whether kids are equipped to 
> handle it or not.  Wouldn't a thoughtful parent want them to be 
> prepared for what they may face as teens and adults?  I thought 
that 
> was what parenting was all about.

Carolyn (just had to jump in here):

As I follow this argument (and many others) about the dubious 
benefits of Molly's all-smothering mother-love (idly wonder if this 
is where the term 'smothering' came from), I am struck by the 
possibility that this is yet another clever JKR commentary on another 
strong theme in the books - Lily's loving sacrifice of her life for 
Harry. 

Despite arguments as to whether Lily knew what she was doing, or how 
or who did the actual protecting, we have been encouraged to approve 
of the mystical depth of this sacrifice, which is apparently keeping 
Harry alive to this day at Privet Drive. However, to my mind, Molly 
provides the counterpoint to this theme - that such all-embracing 
love can be a tiresome burden as well, and possibly have untoward 
consequences. Even Dumbledore admits he was wrong keeping Harry in 
the dark by the end of Oop, so Molly's judgement is questionable in 
the kitchen scene. She is coming across oddly like Percy in showing 
such blind loyalty to her leader.

These are books about children growing up, and particularly for the 
boys involved, it has to be about cutting the apron strings. The 
great sadness for me about Sirius's death was exactly that he 
represented all the dangers Molly is so afraid of. Boys have got to 
do what boys have got to do, and all that.

Much as Harry longs for his family, in my view, Molly represents yet 
another lesson for the poor kid that everything is not as it seems, 
and that mother-love might not be as wonderful as he imagines.