SHIP cliches (Was: Re: H/H SHIP)

[dtbonett]

No: HPFGUIDX 79955

"a_reader2003" wrote:
> I am in my mid 40s, and can't think of anyone I knew at 
> school who either married their school sweetheart, or if they had a 
> serious relationship then, is still in it. 

I am in my mid-forties and still with my husband that I started dating
at age 18. I am very happy with him, although maybe some would
classify our relationship as 

>incredibly > stereotypical from the 50s era (I am thinking of my own
>parents here).

To each their own.  I would tend to think of us as stable, secure and
peaceful rather than stereotypical. Off-hand, I know many couples who
are similar. My brother is married to his high school girlfriend (met
at aged 15), my cousin just hit 27 years with her husband met at aged
20, I stopped counting when I got to ten couples that I know like
this, including friends as well as family. Maybe one tends to hang out
with people who are similar/have similar experiences, so that if you
have been a relationship a long time, your friends tend to have done
the same thing?  I know there are many divorces and troubled
relationships out there and I also do have close friends who have been
divorced, obviously, (some remarried and some not)  but long-term
couples like us are also part of the 'real world' still nowadays,
although we get no publicity. 

I think having been through what she has, JK Rowling
might especially value stability. It looks like she has got this now
herself and she looks very content. I agree that she probably won't

> dispose of all the kids in neat pairs

Nor should she, but I  do not understand why

>permanent, marriage-type  relationships <snip>
would be 
> totally  the wrong message for 21st century kids--


 I would think that that sort of relationship they would be a goal for
most people eventually no matter what the century, although of course
any marriage relationship, at whatever age you start it involves
> compromises and difficulties.

That said, I do not think the HP books are like Jane Austen, that is,
I don't think they are about finding the right marriage partner, so
the relationships in them will always be just a subtext to the primary
theme of the battle between good and evil.  

Note: I would have said the Dursleys, although a very stable couple,
are more stereotypical like the 50's, at least to outside appearances
(someone who didn't know them wouldn't know how mean they are).  Molly
Weasley is a very strong woman who knows whats what, stands up to her
husband when she thinks he is not on the right track, and is an equal
member of the Order, besides raising some very impressive kids
(except, at the moment, Percy).She has dealt with poverty well.  She
is not in la-la land, loses her temper when pressed (though she is
kind) and obviously has a lot of feeling for the people around her,
not just her kids.  She stands up to Sirius too and says some very
sensible things to him.  Mr. Weasley also has a lot of courage to stay
in the job that he likes, rather than doing what others (including
Percy) think he should.  Kids could have worse role models.

D. Bonett