He’s My Goyle (filk)

[Caius Marcius]

No: HPFGUIDX 80050

Vincent Crabbe in his first solo! 

He's My Goyle

To the tune of Tom Lehrer's She's My Girl

Hear a MIDI at:

http://members.aol.com/quentncree/lehrer/mygirl.htm

Dedicated to Pippin

THE SCENE: Slytherin Commons. Enter VINCENT CRABBE

CRABBE:
Shrakes gotta swim, and ghouls gotta moan,
I gotta have a sidekick all my own.
To Herm or Fred or Ron,
He may be a moron,
But to me, well,
He's my Goyle. 

He enters the classroom with a mind quite blurred
And he chortles and he snickers `cause he cannot speak in words.
His Full-Scale IQ
Is almost 22
But he's my Goyle, he's my Goyle, he's my Goyle,
`Cause I'm like him!

The Goyle whose affect's blunted 
The Goyle whose brain is stunted
The Goyle who loudly grunted
The Goyle that rat confronted
The Goyle Neville affronted
Is the Goyle that weighs three hundred three.

So when we tag alongside Draco as if we were glued
I know that I'm on the same wavelength as that dude.
And he's got such a knack
For making knuckles crack
So, oh well, can't you tell,
He's my Goyle,
`Cause I'm like him!

     - CMC

HARRY POTTER FILKS
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm