Am I the only one

[a_reader2003]

No: HPFGUIDX 95672

--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, BrwNeil at a... wrote:
> Has anyone else's opinion of Molly Weasley changed?  
(snip) 
> Does anyone else feel like telling her to shut her mouth or is it 
just me?
> 
> Neil
> 
Carolyn:
Neil, health warning - this topic invokes the mum brigade, big time, 
every time it comes up; get out your tin helmet and stand your 
ground. 

I SO totally agree; the woman's a nightmare. I would certainly leave 
home on a definitive basis as soon as possible if she was my mother 
(actually, I did, but that's another story). And she's dangerous -
Harry increasingly needs to know what is going on, and her over-
protectiveness does him no good the older he gets. Hell, JKR even 
spells it out to us 'He had been touched by what she had said about 
his being as good as a son, but he was also impatient with her 
**mollycoddling**. Sirius was right, he was not a child.' (OOP p.86, 
UK edition, my emphasis. I am sure she is called Molly as a reminder 
of this well-known British term for fusspot parenting).

In the earlier books it didn't come out so much - nothing wrong in 
her administering big hugs, presents and enormous meals, but she was 
rather a stereotype who didn't seem important. In OOP, like so much 
else, things have got much more complicated. IMNVHO she is making the 
classic mistake of a lot of parents in continuing to act like a cop, 
when she should really face up to the fact that her kids and their 
friends are now young adults. 

Its the toughest part of being a parent, suddenly having to change 
the way you interact, acknowledging independent views, accepting 
criticism, having to debate things, letting go, watching as mistakes 
are made. Much simpler to carry on in little Hitler mode, which she 
does with a vengeance, treating everyone in her (war)path like small 
children, including her husband and other adults. 

The cheapness of her remark to Sirius 'the thing is, it's been rather 
difficult for you to look after him while you've been locked up in 
Azkaban, hasn't it?' just shows how limited her outlook is. Whatever 
Sirius's shortcomings as a potential godparent might be, she knows 
the exact truth of why he was in Azkaban. Did she really consider it 
so rash of him to track down Pettigrew once he realised what had 
happened at Godric's Hollow? Did she have no feeling for his 
sufferings and remorse, all those years he spent rotting in jail?

What is also happening here is that she is asserting her motherlove 
as the be all and end all of what children need, and refusing to 
acknowledge that Sirius might have something to offer as a father 
figure/substitute as well. She's totally usurped Arthur's role in her 
own family for years, and doesn't like it one bit when she's up 
against someone with a bit more spunk. The only way she knows how to 
react is to try and reduce Sirius to a child as well.

In Harry's case in particular, since he has had no parental figures 
to speak of, he has learnt very young to be pretty independent, so 
she is on a losing wicket with him from the start. Although he 
appreciates her kindness, I can think of no instance where her 
strictures actually influence his behaviour. Increasingly they don't 
influence her own children either. Gred & Forge sussed her out years 
ago ('The idiots are letting her get into her stride' said 
George, 'You've got to head her off early otherwise she builds up a 
head of steam and goes on for hours'. OOP,p.100).

Looking at her actions and character in a wider context, I could be 
persuaded that they stem from some episode in VWI, where Arthur was 
Imperio'd and slipped up big time. She has maybe taken control of her 
family so completely because it could happen again. Hence the desire 
for all her children to have proper jobs, behave respectably. She is 
trying to make good the damage done to her family's reputation (which 
Malfoy evidently knows about - there seems special venom in his 
singling out of the Weasley family on many occasions).

But she is definitely a weak spot in the Order - she could be 
blackmailed or otherwise persuaded to betray them in order to save 
her family. As many posters will say ad nauseam, its apparently a 
fundamental instinct of parents to do this, but I hope Dumbledore has 
factored it in to his plans, and makes sure she never knows too much.

Carolyn, fuming.