Emotional Intimacy in the HP stories (not necessarily romantic)

[susanbones2003]

No: HPFGUIDX 105539

--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, "harp66" <harp66 at y...> wrote:
> I'd like to address a related issue of intimacy, how it is 
depicted 
> in these stories.
> 
> Is the relationship between Harry and Ron a good model of teenage 
> male friendship? In GoF we learn that Ron is the person who means 
> most to Harry. Is that reciprocated? And why don't they discuss 
girls?
> 
> And Hermione. What are community members' thoughts on the way her 
> friendship with Ron/Harry is depicted in terms of sharing herself 
> with them emotionally? Shared adventures aside, how deep is their 
> relationship? And why isn't she shown to have female intimates? Is 
> this a flaw in the stories?
> 
> "harp66"

I am just getting initiated into the current world of "teen" talk 
and I can tell you, the conversations I hear contain very little 
emotional depth. This story follows what's in Harry's mind and heart 
and we know how much feeling he has but how rarely he can 
communicate it adequately. I can't get over how dead on this aspect 
of the writing is. That yawning gap between Harry's inner life and 
his outward experience is brilliant. That overwhelming desire to 
reach out to Harry and tell him it's okay to ask for help is so full 
of pathos.  And, even though this group regularly seems to forget 
they are children in a world that still allows for childhood, 
perhaps they are talking about their lives at the level at which 
they understand them.  Beyond that, Harry grew up with no friends 
whatsoever. Ron and Hermione are rather late introductions to his 
experiences. He's taken to them well, but perhaps he's still more of 
a loner than we ever seem to recognize as is perhaps, someone 
suggested, Hermione. With all this said, I do not find their lack 
of "deep conversation" a drawback, flaw or oversight on the author's 
part. The fact that all three go into all manner of danger for each 
other is much more important than talking about their emotional 
lives. Actions do speak louder than words, even on paper.
Jennifer