[HPforGrownups] Re: Ghosts / Hermione & parents /

[Shaun Hately]

No: HPFGUIDX 102489

On 22 Jun 2004 at 12:33, (Mrs.) Lee Storm (God Is The  wrote:

> <Snip>
> [Lee]:
> And, at the end of OOTP, there was a lot of hugging and affection from
> Hermione's parents; estranged parents wouldn't, IMO, act in such a manner
> toward their daughter.

A lot of hugging and affection?

Not in my opinion.

"'Ah, Harry!' said Mr Weasley, turning from Hermione's parents, who 
he had just greeted enthusiastically, and who were now taking it in 
turns to hug Hermione. 'Well - shall we do it, then?'

'Yeah, I reckon so, Arthur,' said Moody.

He and Mr Weasley took the lead across the station towards the 
Dursleys, who were apparently rooted to the floor. Hermione 
disengaged herself gently from her mother to join the group."

In other words, when Hermione has contact with her parents for the 
first time in months, having bailed out on a family holiday, and 
having almost been killed in a battle only a short time before...

she hugs her parents for a moment - and then disengages herself 
from her mother and walks away from her to join the Wizarding 
World.

Now, of course, there's other potential explanations for this 
besides estrangement. Hermione, I think, knows what is happening 
and it's perfectly reasonable that even if she still has a good 
relationship with her parents that she might think standing with 
all of Harry's friends to face the Dursleys is important enough to 
postpone her reunion with her parents for a few minutes.

*But*, I don't think what we see with Hermione and her parents at 
the end of OotP can be categorised as a 'lot of hugging and 
affection'. If that occurs - and it might - it occurs after Harry 
has left the scene. All we see in the book is a moment or so of 
contact.
 
> I believe that Hermione is a very independent young lady who loves her folks
> very much.  Perhaps, in her own sense of teenage rebellion, she's choosing
> where she wants to be, the Grangers see the Weasleys as responsible people
> and don't mind.

All possible - but it still means Hermione is still choosing the 
Wizarding World over the Muggle one, her parents inhabit - and that 
creates a distance. It doesn't have to have anything to do with 
love or lack of it.
 
> As far as the whole prefect thing is concerned, that doesn't sound cold to
> me; it sounds like Hermione's giving them information she knows they can
> relate to, rather than overwhelming them with more wizarding stuff.  She
> knows her parents can relate to things like top grades (re the OWLs) and
> cool titles (prefect.)

But again, this is estrangement. If Hermione doesn't feel able to 
discuss the world she lives in for nine months of the year with her 
parents, that is likely to create a distance between them. Again, 
it's got nothing to do with love or lack thereof.

> As far as lying about staying at school to study and then hopping over to
> GP, like...tell me you didn't sometimes tell your parents one thing and do
> another when you were a teen? :-)  And, she knew Harry really needed a
> boost.  I'm sure that, when Dd told her what had happened, her first thought
> was what could she do to help Harry and be a friend and support.  Telling
> her folks any part of the story might have been as good as divulging
> classified information, in her thinking.

Sure - but again, the same applies. Whatever her reasons, no matter 
how good they are, how noble they are (and personally I think it's 
more likely she headed to Grimmauld Place to be there for Ron and 
Ginny, rather than Harry - when she arrived, she certainly went to 
Harry because he needed her, but I think she'd more likely been 
told that Mr Weasley had almost been killed and so her thoughts on 
leaving were for the Weasleys).

If she is unable to tell her parents important things like this, 
it's likely to be creating a distance there.
 
> No...if there had been any estrangement, I don't think her interaction with
> her Mum and Dad at the end of OOPT would have been so close.

Hmm... maybe people have misunderstood what I mean when I say 
'estrangement', but I can't think of a better word.

Estrangement does *not* necessarily mean people's love for each 
other diminishes. It can mean that, sure, but it doesn't have to.

A person can very easily be estranged from those they love, because 
their lives are so different, and it's hard to bridge the two.

I'm not, for a moment, suggesting that Hermione doesn't love her 
parents, or vice versa. If she didn't love them, she probably 
wouldn't care about them understanding she is a prefect - but her 
life is different from theirs, in a way that they cannot 
understand. It's a different world, with different rules. And that 
is likely to create barriers even in the most loving family.


Yours Without Wax, Dreadnought
Shaun Hately | www.alphalink.com.au/~drednort/thelab.html
(ISTJ)       | drednort at alphalink.com.au | ICQ: 6898200 
"You know the very powerful and the very stupid have one
thing in common. They don't alter their views to fit the 
facts. They alter the facts to fit the views. Which can be 
uncomfortable if you happen to be one of the facts that 
need altering." The Doctor - Doctor Who: The Face of Evil
Where am I: Frankston, Victoria, Australia